I read the whole thing
Well, he stepped out and I got to read his FB messages to one personin its entirety. It literally made me ill. She knows about me, yet has the audacity to say "save enough for me" or "don't use it all on her". He has been telling her about me bc in one she asks does she still live with her exH? It then goes on with the pornographic details....the same stuff he knew I read about my exH and his skank. Thing is, I had my kids for an outing last night with him and his friend and his friends kids so I chose to remain quiet due to the fact I was an hour away and too tired to drive.
We had/have plans this weekend like many...I don't know even know what to say or how to say it. I wish someone I know could send him a pm on FB, text, or email saying they are my friend and I know what's going on. Do I send the Ow a brief message that I know and he will be dealt with, do I contact her husband bc he has the right to know? I don't know. All I know is I'm numb again and sick bc it's been about three years together--he has been doing this for three years from what I can see. She is by far everything he makes fun of....I know it's just sex and nothing more for them but I was not involved in this decision. I'm concerned for my health.
It's easy tonsayvwalk away but when you love/care for someone, for me it's not so easy even though I deserve so much more. I feel like "using" him until close to summer is over just because and then dropping the bomb, but I know I just prolong the agony. I think it will fester and I will blow. I don't know what to say or how to say it bc it was gained without his knowledge. Someone, help...please. I just hurt today.
We had/have plans this weekend like many...I don't know even know what to say or how to say it. I wish someone I know could send him a pm on FB, text, or email saying they are my friend and I know what's going on. Do I send the Ow a brief message that I know and he will be dealt with, do I contact her husband bc he has the right to know? I don't know. All I know is I'm numb again and sick bc it's been about three years together--he has been doing this for three years from what I can see. She is by far everything he makes fun of....I know it's just sex and nothing more for them but I was not involved in this decision. I'm concerned for my health.
It's easy tonsayvwalk away but when you love/care for someone, for me it's not so easy even though I deserve so much more. I feel like "using" him until close to summer is over just because and then dropping the bomb, but I know I just prolong the agony. I think it will fester and I will blow. I don't know what to say or how to say it bc it was gained without his knowledge. Someone, help...please. I just hurt today.
Replies
Dear god, I am so sorry you have to deal with this. That feeling. That sick feeling of being betrayed. I know it, too. I wish I could say the thing that would make it all disappear. You know as well as I that No such words exist. You have my sincere sympathy, though. What a shithead! You know what you should do, but I\'m the last person to wag a finger at you and lecture you about the \"right thing to do.\" It hurts like Hell. I know it does. Yeah, you crossed a line, but so did he. A big line for a LONG time. Now to clean up the mess. I am triggering a lot of my own hurt and anguish from my marriage after reading your journal entry. Once again, I am so sorry. You have the spine to get through this. You also have the support. I\'m around. You know we are all here for you. (((hug!!)))
Hug.!
Take a deep breath. You deserve better because you are better than that. Walk away and let him stagnate where he is. We are here for you.
I say if you can put up with it, get what you want from him and then dump him. Cheaters are the worst and deserve what they get. If you don\'t think you can bear being around him, then get away and find someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
Fuck that it was gained without his knowledge. As far as I\'m concerned phones are fair play in \'committed\'relationships. But I, like you, found shit on my xh\'s phone and have trust issues because of it. Oh and kick him in the balls when you dump him. He deserves it! Sorry, apparently I have anger issues ;)
Mavsie. You know my backstory. He knew my backstory. My anxiety right now it high and I feel I\'m going to blow. I think time away on my own might be a good thing for me in the end. I wish so many things to be different. IDK, if I should write down my thoughts, I just don\'t know. No I do know, I just have a hard time with confrontation on those I care/ed about. Anyone else I WILL get in your face.
Please think very carefully about staying with this man...
Gosh.... like your other friends, I am SO SORRY. If it would help I would drive up and knee him in the nuts... bet feeling kneed is what YOU are going through.
Honestly, after 3 years on dating sites, I am convinced they ALL do this. Every last one that is online does this.
Not is any way trying to mitigate the magnitude of what he has done, merely saying.... I think the vast majority are cheats.
How painful that this is happening. My honest opinion: anyway you can use him, IF you can, DO IT. But I know your heart and I don\'t think you are the type that can milk a situation like this. You are sincere and passionate, and users, the type that could make this situation \"work\" for them.... rarely possess those qualities.
Honey, I am so very sorry for the loss for your trust and faith and good opinion of him....
Better get the testing done. I am hoping you get it free or at cost.
Yes, I am quite concerned for you as well. It\'s not only sex. It is about respecting you and communicating with YOU! Hugs and prayers