I need more friends

I need more friends...
It's something that I know about myself. But friends are so much work because they are all from Mental Illness Land. I'm high maintenance, they're high maintenance...it's just exhausting to think about.
The only time I want friends is when I need someone to talk to. That's not a very good reason to have friends, I don't think. I feel like my world isn't big enough for friends...I just don't have the energy to keep them. Everyone drifts away without sustained effort on my part.
Meh, maybe I'll just stick with my reptiles and call it a day.
 
I know I used to have fun with friends, I used to be out almost every night. That was exhausting too..and expensive...and it only takes a few weeks, now your are obligated to go. I have to go, they're expecting me.
And the cycle starts.
Blargh...I shouldn't have started this...it's making me more depressed.
Maybe more to come later.