I Need a New Word
When I think of the word suicide I picture a person who wants to kill themselves due to depression or other problems. But what about the person who simply wants to go to Heaven. A person who enjoyed life before losing a spouse, but now finds life here intolerable. This person is not looking to pick up a gun and shoot themselves, they're hoping to go to sleep and wake up on the other side. This person, imho, is not suicidal, but there is no word in the English language to describe what they want.
I was thinking about that today when thoughts of being with God went through my mind again. Living on this planet means being alone, not having my husband, struggling to maintain a job, a living. It means struggling to pay the rent, to get alone with my father.
And Heaven...means utter happiness. It means being with my husband and everone I love on the other side. It means streets paved in gold, walking with Jesus, a world of love. There, my future is secure--no more worrying about falling and no one around to pick me up. No more worrying about coming home alone and the crime that seems to follow women.
So there's here and there's Heaven. The choice seems simple. But dare any of us tell our loved ones what we are thinking? Would they understand?
Since I've been a member of this group, I've noticed a number of people who've expressed the same thing. These statements are usually followed by 'I'm not suicidal." It's just too bad that we don't have a word that would explain what we really mean: We want to be happy again.
I was thinking about that today when thoughts of being with God went through my mind again. Living on this planet means being alone, not having my husband, struggling to maintain a job, a living. It means struggling to pay the rent, to get alone with my father.
And Heaven...means utter happiness. It means being with my husband and everone I love on the other side. It means streets paved in gold, walking with Jesus, a world of love. There, my future is secure--no more worrying about falling and no one around to pick me up. No more worrying about coming home alone and the crime that seems to follow women.
So there's here and there's Heaven. The choice seems simple. But dare any of us tell our loved ones what we are thinking? Would they understand?
Since I've been a member of this group, I've noticed a number of people who've expressed the same thing. These statements are usually followed by 'I'm not suicidal." It's just too bad that we don't have a word that would explain what we really mean: We want to be happy again.
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