I\'m in deep shit....
The possibility of my Mum's bf moving in is now quite probable. Sometime next week or the week after. He has plucked up the courage to ask which is what my Mum was waiting for.Trouble is...I'm in the shit. I've been told at day patients that if this happens, because of all his problems, they will see me as a 'vunerable' adult and have to fill out these forms. It's called POVA (Protection Of Vunerable Adults) WHAT THE FUCK AM I GOING TO DO!!!!My Mum doesn't know that I've told my therapist about all this shit and she's going to be so angry if she finds out. They will have to involve my Mum though with these forms! What am I going to do!!! I can't handle this!!!
Replies
hi..I\'ve had a quick look at this. I checked with my doctor today I was on a mental health register, not this one. I would ask at the day centre for advice or your therapist. I would hope they have seen similar situations before where they need to hide what triggered the POVA and I would hope they would be sympathetic to helping YOU because this is meant for your protection and if it makes your life more difficult that\'s hardly the spirit of POVA.
It was her decision to let BF move in..and she\'s completely aware of your condition..if she wants the BF bad enough,she\'s going to have to play the game,and follow the rules....it\'s her choice..not yours..don\'t let her anger get in the way of your well being
hugs
dd
seems to be a british program to protect people if i understand it well and you are worried about your mum reaction because you told them, sure acuriousfish is right ask them for help to stop all this.take care.xxxx.christine
Hello hun, this is a difficult entry to answer because l can see both sides of this problem. You don\'t want your mother to feel you can\'t keep personal problems in the home but you tell your therapist about your private life. That your mums b/f could be moving in, this is understandable therapists should be told everything that concerns us so we can get better and feel stable.
I don\'t know what troubles your future step father has but for you to now be watched by outside agencies they must feel rightly or not that for a short time you must have closer contact to make sure you are ok.
The only solution l can see is for you to tell your therapist all your concerns about your mother being told, after all when she is told you might have to live in a bad atmosphere. You can\'t stop the forms being filled to watch and protect you, but perhaps how your mother is told could be done with as much tact as possible to help the fallout between you and her. And for people to realise just how upset or angry your mother could be with you, you have to tell everyone you can before she is told.
Your therapist will listen and hear you, write your concerns down if you have to but tell them, no one wants you so scared and worried that you become ill over this, and no one wants to make your home life unbearable when they are trying to protect you.
You have to take this one step at a time. First, talk to the people at day patients/your therapists and let them know the situation. They will probably be able to prevent this issue by only telling stuff to your mom that will not upset her or having her only fill out stuff that will not make her mad.
The MOST important thing is for you to take care of yourself! Don\'t worry about your mom or anyone else. You need to be able to talk to your therapist about whatever you want without having to worry - that\'s the point of therapy.
Your mom\'s feelings and everyone else\'s feeling are not your responisibility and you shouldn\'t have to worry about them.
What do you think your mom will say and do if she gets mad?
Please keep venting on here so we can support you through this.
hugs!
gotta do wats right for u and fill out those forms