I'm about to ruin it all.. again, like I always do :'(
I'm going down that track of not eating again, why do I do this, because I am beyond control. I don't actually have any reasons to why I do this other than I am just so incredibly sick of myself and my body. I know how devastated I will be when I won't be able to get the best grades in univsersity and maybe not even be able to finish the course, but it feels like there is just no stopping it this time. Its ended, I can't do this anymore. Goodbye good grades, 'cured' recovery (from my family and friends), I can't run any more, I'm fallen into its trap yet again. Thanks ED, its all your fault.. You are the ruins of my life.