I Just Need To Hang It Up....
I came on here to work on healthy relationships....as I open up and trust, I am discovering I really have none. I have no right to stay in the HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP group.
I joined the BREAK UPS AND DIVORCE page.....but, guess what? I am still here under the same roof with hubby. In the past few months, I have mentioned divorce several times. The last time was a couple of weeks ago. That time, i was teamed up on by him and his two sisters. They all were quick to remind me of what a struggle we would both have separately (financially with single incomes again) They know me well enough to know fear and guilt do seem to keep me stuck and miserable... so they convinced me to "think a bit longer" I am currently waiting on a small chunk taken from my retirement funds to help me start out as well as toward legal costs. ideally, I should put it all toward our debt, but I have continued to try to do that leaving me scrimping to try to catch up, while he never worries as debt grows.
Fear of how rough things will be til all is settled has also helped to keep me stuck here , once gain, going through the motions. I also believe I don't belong in that BU&D group either.
As far as I can tell.... right now...DEPRESSION and LONELINESS...... and we can't forget SEXLESS MARRIAGE are the only places I should be. I am hitting a bit of a rough patch right now. Questioning my judgement as i am trusting others i shouldn't have.....but still not wanting to be so cynical to believe there are no good , kind, honest people around.
I am thinking I need to stop feeling sorry for myself and "suck it up Nancy".......or maybe simply get that duct tape? :(
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No, no, HELL NO! Don't you dare be a "suck it up Nancy!" And no duct tape either!! We get only one life with no do overs. Yes my cliche I say all the time maybe cheesy but it's so true because tomorrow isn't promised to us! You need to live your life like today's your last!
My DH was murdered two years ago right across the street from where we used to live and for awhile I wanted to crawl under a rock and die; I almost went back to an ex who wasn't a good guy just to have someone, but thank goodness I reunited with my true love!!
As far as your SIL's you need to tell them f**k the hell off and kiss your a$$ because they're not you; it's your life so their input is absolutely irrelevant! Yeah the struggle may be real for quite some time before you get on your feet, but guess what all of us have some struggle that's real! So you need to ask yourself if being miserable for the remainder of your time on earth really worth depression/stress, etc. to be "ok" financially?
As far as the groups I don't think you should leave them unless there's someone who's messing with you, if that's the case there's a wonderful ignore button! Yep I use it ;)
There still are some good people left in this world; they're few and far between but out there! Please don't sell yourself short by hanging on to a marriage that's not even a marriage.
Thank you . You are right we only get one life.....I have just wasted so much time. I was finally believing there is so much more out there and I have so much to give, but I trust too easily. (I need a detector for serial killers and scum buckets. lol) the more time passes with me still here, the more I wonder if I will ever leave?