I just miss him

I'm not angry or sad, I feel okay, today - I dont know tomorrow - I feel at peace with myself, I feel somewhat happy but I miss him, I miss talking to him, I miss him in my life and I wish.  I wish for things to be different, I wish we were able to fix things.  I miss the man that he was, I miss my marriage, I miss our happy memories, I miss the laughs.  Is like a death but with no finality - my dad passed away and I miss him, I also miss talking to him but I can't change death, death is final and I found acceptance in my dad's death but I haven't been able to find that finality in the death of my marriage, I haven't been able to stop wishing.  I have found some acceptance but part of me still misses my husband more than anything. 

Replies

PeterMaq
PeterMaq

I hear you, I miss her everyday, Today someone form DS gave me a great gift, a song and a video that really cheer me up today when I was ready to get depressed once again, so please watch it and tell me what you think:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyX-I-um5Kk

For me it was inspirational and motivating. Best os Hugs ! Pedro.
aditi1974
aditi1974

I dont miss him but I think of him...guess thinking is not the same thing as missing. I miss the marriage, our small family and its moments , but not him. When I think of him, I think of his rejection. He is gone--he is no longer the person I once knew and cared for. But I go through some confusing times myself with the \'how did things turn this way--we were so happy!\' and then i have to work on the \'acceptance\' and \'letting go\' part again ! Its normal and its ok and I hope we\'ll find things easier with time . Hugs, Aditi
playerapr
playerapr

Adity maybe you are right - I do think of him often and maybe I just miss my marriage - it is confusing at times.
@ Peter - beautiful video!! makes you think about the things that you have and should appreciate.
Karenhopeful
Karenhopeful

I think these are very normal thoughts that just take some time to come to terms with. You are doing fabulously well!
lostntx
lostntx

I could have written this entry. But now I realize I miss the person I thought that my stbxw was. It\'s still hard because you have a dream image of that person but now reality is very different. Just keep moving forward. You are doing great!
yougospam
yougospam

I know I\'m jumping on board here long after you wrote this but I could have written your post. My mom passed away and I struggled more with the loss of my marriage then to the loss of my mom, I totally understood what you meant regarding your dad.
My question is do you still feel this way after so many years? I hope that you are doing well.