I just don't understand.......

why can't i get any help? why do doctors expose you to quests for treatments and then, when you can't work, function or even think, they turn their back on you? 
i'm sure this is not true in every area, but it is certainly true in mine.  all i ever asked for was for help to maintain some kind of normalcy.
i have lost my home, repeatedly, my job repeatedly and have cordoned myself off from most of society.  i think because i was/am unable to think straight, due to the pain and stress from my condition.  but here's the kicker.....no one will help me!  i just don't get it.
i know that i should be thankful for what i have (nothing) which in itself is probably a blessing, because if you don't have anything, you can't lose anything.
i could go on but it would only dampen my spirits....what i regret the most about this whole venture is that i don't have the energy to spend the the quality time i want and need to with my children and grandson.
when all is said and done, now that i have rightfully pointed out the mistakes that all most took my life, instead of the dr using it as a learning experience, they have blackballed me in this community.....so now i just die a slow and painful death everyday.......why does this have to ME?