I just cannot move on without you. I am tired
Joe
You see everyone seems to be movign alone in their live and jobs and I am just stuck. YOu know how down I was all year long after not being able to work again and you know how many years I went to school every night to get my masters and move up on the job. You were the one who kept saying it would get better and now I could be retired early like you and we could be together all the time with no worries.
Joe now I dont have my career, my school and I dont have you. There is nothing left for me and you realize that I am sure. I stayed here alone this weekend and let the girls have their own lives. It is time to stop taking from them. They are young and need to go our and enjoy...not care for mom all the time. Your friends have abandon me totally since they afraid of getting "involved" with your ex and the boys. I guess I can understand their need not to take sides. I am not looking for someone to be on my side Joe, I am looking for them to acknowledge my existence and remember the time we all had together.
Why is it when I write these message I cry? Should I give up the house Joe? Is there a life her for me at all in the future..only you can see that now. where would I go? I cannot move back in to the brooklyn apartment again after just getting out of there. I do not want to toss Nicole out after she just did the place over again and living with her as she suggests would stop her from enjoying her freedom and life. I guess if I had my health back I could figure all this out and even pop on a subway to get somewhere, but you and I both know that hundreds of doctors have said there is nothign they can do to repair the damage to my balance.
If I could just have a few minutes with you so you could talk to me and tell me what you think is best and how to fix this mess with your family. I love you so very much...not matter what happened in our past, i know in my heat that these last few years, it was just "us" and our love was so strong. I miss you so very much every second of the day.
You see everyone seems to be movign alone in their live and jobs and I am just stuck. YOu know how down I was all year long after not being able to work again and you know how many years I went to school every night to get my masters and move up on the job. You were the one who kept saying it would get better and now I could be retired early like you and we could be together all the time with no worries.
Joe now I dont have my career, my school and I dont have you. There is nothing left for me and you realize that I am sure. I stayed here alone this weekend and let the girls have their own lives. It is time to stop taking from them. They are young and need to go our and enjoy...not care for mom all the time. Your friends have abandon me totally since they afraid of getting "involved" with your ex and the boys. I guess I can understand their need not to take sides. I am not looking for someone to be on my side Joe, I am looking for them to acknowledge my existence and remember the time we all had together.
Why is it when I write these message I cry? Should I give up the house Joe? Is there a life her for me at all in the future..only you can see that now. where would I go? I cannot move back in to the brooklyn apartment again after just getting out of there. I do not want to toss Nicole out after she just did the place over again and living with her as she suggests would stop her from enjoying her freedom and life. I guess if I had my health back I could figure all this out and even pop on a subway to get somewhere, but you and I both know that hundreds of doctors have said there is nothign they can do to repair the damage to my balance.
If I could just have a few minutes with you so you could talk to me and tell me what you think is best and how to fix this mess with your family. I love you so very much...not matter what happened in our past, i know in my heat that these last few years, it was just "us" and our love was so strong. I miss you so very much every second of the day.
Replies
So sorry...it is so hard we don\'t have them anymore to talk to and help us through life...I hope you find some guidance in your heart.
-MJ
I know your hurting and I am lifting you prayer everyday, in scripture today, I read of a army coming to tear to shreds a town that had no way of defeating them. They prayed to God and asked for Him to save them, they believed He would and sure enough, they were saved. It was not just like that, they first had to go to the temple and pray to God and believe it.
A prophet told them to go to meet the army and so they did, half way as they arrived half way they decided to put their priests in front singing praises to the Lord. Because they were doing this the enemy armies turned confused and ended up killing each other.
It was a victory by God because they asked God and they believed God would save them.
2 Chronicles 20:15
Please read this Scripture and Believe God has control.
15 He said, Listen, all you people of Judah and Jerusalem! Listen, King Jehoshaphat! This is what the LORD says: Do not be afraid! Dont be discouraged by this mighty army, for the battle is not yours, but Gods.
Ann, I am praying for you but you need to pray too, and you also need to have faith.
hugs,
Judy
Annie, I feel so bad for you!!! I know how debilitating the balance issues can be, and I know yours are much worse than mine are. I wish there was a magic wand I could wave and make it all better but i can\'t, and neither can Joe even though he listens every time you talk to him and trys to help in that spirit way they have.
You said your daughter suggested you move in with her? You are not tossing her out then, and you will have somone there just in case you need help? Sounds like a good plan to at least have some time to find out what it is you do or do not want to do? You could do it on a temporary basis, and then see if it fits for both of you?
I know you need help, and the friends are not being the friends you DESERVE. I wish they were. YES you and JOE had SPECIAL LOVE and it was cut short. don\'t let ANYONE tell you anydifferent, and don\'t think any different. This is all out of your control my friend and my heart is hurting for you now.
Why don\'t you talk further with you daughter and see how the two of you really feel, and what can possibly be worked out so you don\'t have to be so alone? Could this is a roundabout way be JOE helping you make the decision to stay with your daughter?
wish you were closer. I\'d check on you myself!
HUGS and hope it all works out. diane