I have been fighting me
I am glad that I read through old journals and found my way back to this site. When I joined it helped me so much to share and to read and to be in a place where healing was promoted.
I realized this morning after doing some soul searching that the only person that I have been fighting is me. I am the only one responsible for my emotions and the choices I make when I am driven by those emotions. I also realize that I do have choices. I don't have to live in a situation that makes me uncomfortable. I don't have to put up with bad behavior even if it does come from my children.
Maybe my ideas of what this perfect world was to look like is a little crooked. That's okay as long as I know that the crooked looks just fine on me. I have to accept it for what it is or I need to do something to change it. At the end of the day the only one I am fighting is me. Learning to let go has never been something that I have done well. It needs to be the new goal or mantra. Not sure letting go can be a goal. I do know that I have to continue to work towards it and stop fighting against it. At the end of the day the only control I have is over me.
I feel better just having written that out. It makes sense to me.
I realized this morning after doing some soul searching that the only person that I have been fighting is me. I am the only one responsible for my emotions and the choices I make when I am driven by those emotions. I also realize that I do have choices. I don't have to live in a situation that makes me uncomfortable. I don't have to put up with bad behavior even if it does come from my children.
Maybe my ideas of what this perfect world was to look like is a little crooked. That's okay as long as I know that the crooked looks just fine on me. I have to accept it for what it is or I need to do something to change it. At the end of the day the only one I am fighting is me. Learning to let go has never been something that I have done well. It needs to be the new goal or mantra. Not sure letting go can be a goal. I do know that I have to continue to work towards it and stop fighting against it. At the end of the day the only control I have is over me.
I feel better just having written that out. It makes sense to me.
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