I hate love stories

I watched the movie P.S. I love you tonight and it just made my depression worse.  I want to be loved so intensely.  I want to know that I am the woman that makes my dh happy.  I want to laugh and have fun with someone.  The man in the movie adored the woman that he was married to and you could see it on his face.  I know it is just acting,  but I have seen it in real life in other couples.  When I look into dh's eyes,  I don't see anything.  There is no adoring look or even a glimmer of enjoyment.  Maybe it never was there,  or maybe I killed it over the years and there is no way to get it back. Tonight at dinner,  my youngest son said out of the blue that Daddy was being evil when he punched the cabinet and the door and then left.  My heart just about broke in two.  I know that dh is trying,  but is the damage already done?  What am I do do as the mother?