I Guess He Really Just Doesn't Get It.....
Let me start off by saying today i'm actually PISSED OFF!!!!! I'M NOT AN ANGRY PERSON BY NATURE BUT GOD DA@#%$%^$# AND HOLY S@$%#@@ He has his son 4 DAYS A MONTH and Austin was soooo happy to spend the long holiday weekend with his dad. Only to find out today that he picked him up at 7:00 pm on Friday dropped him off at his brother's while he went out then picked him up about 10:30 pm. Then dropped him off at his mom's Austin's grandma's house Sat morning while he went to work picked him back up at 5:00 pm spent the night with him then took him back to his brother's Sunday while he went golfing Austin spent the night at my brother in laws house while he left him again then picked him up at 10:00 am took him to a movie then brought him home to me. Now am I crazy or is that a reasonable visitation!!!!! I mean REALLY I AM SO PISSED OFF RIGHT NOW I COULD LITERALLY CHOKE THE LAST BREATH OUT OF THAT ASS. Austin came home and went to his room he was soooo sad.
I have been really good about holding my mouth around Austin and not saying ANYTHING NEGATIVE OR BAD ABOUT HIS DAD but unfortunatley for my little boy he is starting to see for himself how SELFISH AND STUPID HIS DAD REALLY IS. I wish I could protect him from that hurt but I guess I can't. Should I call my Attorney? Should I tell him if this is what he is going to do during his visitations maybe he just shouldn't have any???? I agreed to the visitations for Austin's sake but if he is just going to drop him off everywhere else so it doesn't interrupt his busy social life than maybe Austin is better off not going AT ALL?????
I can handle all the crap and hurt that man puts on me but when he hurts Austin like that OH MAN WATCH OUT CAUSE THE MAMA IN ME WANTS TO KILL THIS MAN RIGHT NOW. SO INCREDIBLY STUPID AND SELFISH RIGHT. Tonight for the first time I actually saw pure disappointment in the eyes of my little boy he was so sad and let down he said " I just wanted to spend time with my daddy and he kept dropping me off at everyone else's house like he didn't want to spend time with me" OMG I just held him and said well " Mommy will spend alot of time with you at summer camp this week and next weekend too ok" He just said " you always spend lots of time with me mom I don't get to see my dad that much that's why I wanted to spend this long week end with him but he was just to busy" This is not right? I mean I don't think I have ever been this MAD, ANGRY, PISSED If it wasn't going on 11:00 pm here I would be screaming right now. Is he even allowed to drop him off with other people on his visitation weekends and just leave????????? I don't think he is I think the papers state that he is to stay in his custody from 7:00 Friday night until 7:00 pm Sunday night and then returned to me. I'm going to have to go take a cold shower to cool off before I kill someone right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have been really good about holding my mouth around Austin and not saying ANYTHING NEGATIVE OR BAD ABOUT HIS DAD but unfortunatley for my little boy he is starting to see for himself how SELFISH AND STUPID HIS DAD REALLY IS. I wish I could protect him from that hurt but I guess I can't. Should I call my Attorney? Should I tell him if this is what he is going to do during his visitations maybe he just shouldn't have any???? I agreed to the visitations for Austin's sake but if he is just going to drop him off everywhere else so it doesn't interrupt his busy social life than maybe Austin is better off not going AT ALL?????
I can handle all the crap and hurt that man puts on me but when he hurts Austin like that OH MAN WATCH OUT CAUSE THE MAMA IN ME WANTS TO KILL THIS MAN RIGHT NOW. SO INCREDIBLY STUPID AND SELFISH RIGHT. Tonight for the first time I actually saw pure disappointment in the eyes of my little boy he was so sad and let down he said " I just wanted to spend time with my daddy and he kept dropping me off at everyone else's house like he didn't want to spend time with me" OMG I just held him and said well " Mommy will spend alot of time with you at summer camp this week and next weekend too ok" He just said " you always spend lots of time with me mom I don't get to see my dad that much that's why I wanted to spend this long week end with him but he was just to busy" This is not right? I mean I don't think I have ever been this MAD, ANGRY, PISSED If it wasn't going on 11:00 pm here I would be screaming right now. Is he even allowed to drop him off with other people on his visitation weekends and just leave????????? I don't think he is I think the papers state that he is to stay in his custody from 7:00 Friday night until 7:00 pm Sunday night and then returned to me. I'm going to have to go take a cold shower to cool off before I kill someone right now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Replies
I\'m sorry and I do know how you feel. But your ex didn\'t do anything legally wrong. How much real contact did Austin have with his father when he was home with all of you? I bet Austin was with you more than his father during your marriage.
Yes, he should have spent more time with his son. Some men just don\'t get it. Their children are just not the center of their lives and I\'m sorry for little Austin.
You can\'t legally keep Austin from his father. Either his father will step up and do what he should or he will gradually disappear from Austin\'s life.
I understand how angry you are about this, but your stbx\'s behavior doesn\'t surprise me one bit. What\'s going to happen is that, if this continues, Austin isn\'t going to want to spend ANY TIME with his father.When THAT happens, perhaps you will have a legal leg to stand on. In the meantime, keep your mouth shut because I\'m 99% sure there\'s NOTHING you can do about it at this stage of the game.
Trisha is right -- I wonder, as well, what kind of quality time your stbx spent with his son before he left the marriage. My guess is, not much or if he did, it was just going through the motions.
I know how you feel. I never realized how little my stbx cared about my kids until he left. he hasn\'t seen my daughter(23) in a year. I know your son is little. He needs a dad now. He does have a mon who cares very much. That will be enough for him. Hopefully,your stbx will step up or he will disappear from Austin\'s life. Hugs to you.:) Maggie