i fucked up!!!

i really did. plz excuse my language, but it is truly how i feel.  i was going to write this in the morning...but i just couldnt get all of this stuff out of my head. i tried to read and i just couldnt concentrate.  before i go on any further....i truly did fuck up. i said things out of anger that i really shouldnt have. i was WRONG! i am writing this because i need to spew...i am not looking for anybody telling me not to beat myself up over it or anything. i really dont. i am admitting that i was wrong and i have to live with what i said. time will heal, but it doesnt make my words any less hurtful. now many of you know whats been going on with me and i so thank you all for being there for me. words cant describe all of the support i have been given by you all. some of you also know that i needed to have a good talk with trey. i had it all planned out. (i went over it so many times in my mind and made me anxious as heck.) the last 2 days i have been very stressed and emotional because of all of the things on my mind. i am a freakin worrier and i cant help it.since trey is back on here, i will respect his privacy and not go into what actually happened in the convo that never happened, but a fight instead.  i apologize in advance if at all i seem to be all over the place... well things didnt go as planned, i think i was just too emotional and my anger took over. (something i really need to work on.) my plan was to start with how proud i am of him, how much i support him, how much i love him, etc. well it just got ugly like i said and i said really hurtful things. i feel so bad. i tried to tell him what i wanted to and understandably so, what stung stayed in his mind. i would be the same. i apologized all over the place and assured him that i didnt meant it...i was just so angry and frustrated.  im not going to go on and rehash the same things over and over...but i am truly sorry, from the bottom of my heart. i really am proud of trey and i support him 110% (thats for you trey, lol,) and i love him to death. we can work thru this, all of it! thanks for listening. mindy