Last night I finally slept all the way through, without getting up and having the pain in my heart for Trevor. I can't believe how I feel, almost guilty to feel so good.
I know what you mean. The first time I realized I had laughed after Jason\'s death I was feeling guilty, how could I have forgotten for one second my grief for my son and actually laughed. But we need to let life go on no matter how much we want to hold it in place. We have to release the quilt we feel going on to a new normal. It\'s the only way to keep our sanity.
Nothing like a good night\'s rest and so happy you had a night like that. They are needed as this work of healing the heart takes so much life force energy.
Loving care and sweet dreams tonight again, I hope.
XO Joanie
I am glad you slept all the way through! I have never had the sleeping problems, thankfully! I think because I had to return to work shortly after Michael\'s death and get back into a routine very quickly. But, boy, did I struggle for the longest time with that guilt! Still surprises me now and then, but not with the intensity of the \"early\" years. Now, it is more of a wonder that I can laugh and not feel guilty! I have to agree with Terry, it is the only way to remain sane. I was just thinking the other day of how I could not have continued to live if I went on feeling the way I did during those 1st couple of years. And yet, it hurts to let go at the same time. More of a sadness now, very deep. I hope you have peaceful nights more and more often.
Peace.
Replies
I know what you mean. The first time I realized I had laughed after Jason\'s death I was feeling guilty, how could I have forgotten for one second my grief for my son and actually laughed. But we need to let life go on no matter how much we want to hold it in place. We have to release the quilt we feel going on to a new normal. It\'s the only way to keep our sanity.
Big tight hugs,
Terry
So glad for you. I know how much us moms don\'t sleep.
Hugs to you and Trevor.
Love
Laura
Oh,,, I never sleep all through the night,,,, I guess I never will,,, but kudos to you for a good nights sleep!!! love ya!
Nothing like a good night\'s rest and so happy you had a night like that. They are needed as this work of healing the heart takes so much life force energy.
Loving care and sweet dreams tonight again, I hope.
XO Joanie
I am glad you slept all the way through! I have never had the sleeping problems, thankfully! I think because I had to return to work shortly after Michael\'s death and get back into a routine very quickly. But, boy, did I struggle for the longest time with that guilt! Still surprises me now and then, but not with the intensity of the \"early\" years. Now, it is more of a wonder that I can laugh and not feel guilty! I have to agree with Terry, it is the only way to remain sane. I was just thinking the other day of how I could not have continued to live if I went on feeling the way I did during those 1st couple of years. And yet, it hurts to let go at the same time. More of a sadness now, very deep. I hope you have peaceful nights more and more often.
Peace.