"I couldn't even eat tonight"

First of all, Merry Christmas to everyone at DS!  I am feeling really lousy, crying most of the night, and now it's almost impossible for me to go to sleep.  What am I going to do with my family and my Bipolar Disorder?  I need my doctor's help so bad, but he is on vacations and didn't leave anyone to replace him.  Can you believe that?  That's almos incredible.  I need a med that he can only provide to fall to sleep(I need it sometimes not always)  I hope the Lord helps me on this one, because I don't want to go to the hospital.  What do you suggest I should do?  Ivonne.