I am so Down Right Now
When I work before 2004 - I Loved Life, I Loved hanging out with My Kids at Home or going out together, I Loved Dating, I loved Hanging out with My Family & Friends, I Loved the trips I was able to Afford to go see my Family out of town, Go to J. Island in Georgia, Jacksonville, Fla & wherever else I wanted to go. Life should be so much Fun. Not feeling like You are Dead but still alive.
After 2004 I worked & I tried to keep pushing Myself to keep working because I was the one paying All My Bills, I made sure I had Food in My House, A Car to go Back & Forth to Work or go anywhere I wanted or Had to go. I have a Very Very Low Self - Esteem. My Mom tells Me I am Gook Looking Women but I only Have Eight Teeth in My Mouth & I see the Ugliness that Only I can see. I am a Good Hearted Woman, I did Love Life at One Time ( For along Time ), I Love to Laugh, Cut Up & just Be that Shiney Person God Intended Me to Be but My Light Of Gods' Love has Burnt out.
In 2009, My Life came to a Complete Stop. No Enjoyment at all, No Job, No Life & Just a Deep Deep Deep Hole Full of No sense of where I belong. I feel so Hollow & so Alone. I know I have people who Love Me Very Very Much but when Your in this state of Mind. You feel like You let Yourself Down. I take care of My Mom 24/7. I am Blessed that We got each Other but We Both Need a Special Someone. I know being on DS Helps but I still feel the way I feel about Myself.
After 2004 I worked & I tried to keep pushing Myself to keep working because I was the one paying All My Bills, I made sure I had Food in My House, A Car to go Back & Forth to Work or go anywhere I wanted or Had to go. I have a Very Very Low Self - Esteem. My Mom tells Me I am Gook Looking Women but I only Have Eight Teeth in My Mouth & I see the Ugliness that Only I can see. I am a Good Hearted Woman, I did Love Life at One Time ( For along Time ), I Love to Laugh, Cut Up & just Be that Shiney Person God Intended Me to Be but My Light Of Gods' Love has Burnt out.
In 2009, My Life came to a Complete Stop. No Enjoyment at all, No Job, No Life & Just a Deep Deep Deep Hole Full of No sense of where I belong. I feel so Hollow & so Alone. I know I have people who Love Me Very Very Much but when Your in this state of Mind. You feel like You let Yourself Down. I take care of My Mom 24/7. I am Blessed that We got each Other but We Both Need a Special Someone. I know being on DS Helps but I still feel the way I feel about Myself.
Replies
You are beautiful inside and that\'s all that matters
Happiness tends to come when we do not pursue it too hard
If you aren\'t in counseling, please consider going. A counselor can help you find your joy again. I would also talk to your doc about some medication for depression, I take Wellbutrin and have had much good success with it.
Also, if you are looking for an affordable means of fixing your teeth, call the licensing board for dentists in your state. Perhaps they can link you with reputable, but relatively inexpensive dentists who could repair your smile.
Sending loads of hugs! I hope you begin to feel better about yourself.
Thanks lonelygal27 & hurtinandhealin2560 for Your Advice. It would be Nice if they had a Foundation to Help people like Me here where I live.