Hyper-sexuality

Between menopause and aging scar-tissue from early sexual trauma, hyper-sexuality has become my most manageable symptom. Or so I have thought. The bizarre twists and turns of the healing network have brought me a string of conversations with folks who reacted to the opposite extreme of wanting to ban sex from the world. Keep that entire knotty snot ball of confusion out of my awareness!!! Just call me, "It." The conversation string has me wondering if my hyper-sexuality has become more manageable or just easier to ignore.

Persilly is the crotch-sniffinest dog I have ever known. That would be one of the traits which earned her the name change from Priscilla to Persilly. Her crotch sniffing compulsion embarasses all new-comers, even the most seasoned of dog-lovers. Give her an inch and she will take a mile. Somewhere around our 4th or 5th year together, I gave up trying to break her of it and resigned myself to a life of apologizing to all who are offended and putting up with a dog nose in my crotch. That second part has provided an interesting contrast to this string of conversations the healing mysteries have brought me.

For an untracked while, Persilly and I had a morning ritual of her resting her nose as deeply in my crotch as she could get it while I rubbed her ears and head. No porn show, here, folks. Anybody who knows dogs knows that dogs love crotch smells. It is how the naturally greet one another. Persilly just happens to like people more than she likes other dogs.

It has been another untracked while since I have allowed the morning ritual. I believe the ritual stopped somewhere in the months I have been alone here in the new base camp. She still misses it enough to whine for it every morning. We have developed a new ritual of whining at one another while I keep my lap covered in blankets and my laptop. She still lunges for her crotch smell fix at every opportunity. The surprised slaps from me have been intense more often than I care to admit.

I doubt I would have noticed this evolution without the string of peer support conversations, but I find myself wondering what else I have over-looked. Sorting. . .