Human Development - Independence is the First Step
"Freedom is devotion to one's best self and fundamentals, and this is often disloyalty to general idols and fetishes." Mark Twain
Based on my research, my experiences and my expressions, I see human growth as a travel - a steep climb from dependence to independence to interdependence to transcendence. This lifetime journey begins at dawn, when we are dependent on our parents and other loved ones.
The process of getting physically independent is automatic with age. It is a natural part of growing up, and also for most of us it comes easily. As we pass through childhood and adolescence and become adults, many of us also figure out how to become financially independent - and that generally requires some concentrated work. We take up jobs, go from our parents' homes, get married and have children - steps toward accepting responsibility for our own lives in addition to for family members that are now hooked on us. For many, our quest for liberty ends here.
But being human isn't only about physical and material improvement. We will need to grow emotionally and intellectually. Emotionally, many of us remain dependent - allowing scenarios around us control our emotions. We can't claim to be independent when we allow ordinary events - traffic jams, forgetful partners, colleague missing deadlines at work, unreasonable customers - to trigger feelings of anger, frustration, helplessness or despair. If we're not masters of our emotions, can we actually be masters of our own destiny?
Emotional maturity or independence isn't about attempting to control what happens to people. Rather it's about how we react to what occurs to us. It is freedom of choice in how we react to adverse circumstances. prolife can lash out, as we may have done as kids, or we can opt to be reasoned and thoughtful and optimistic about moving ahead.
In my workshops on finding the true calling, I borrow a tool from 'The Art of Possibility' by Ben and Rosamund Zander. I ask participants to invoke the feeling of 'How Beautiful' whenever they are in a bad position. By way of example, imagine you're late to an important interview cause a flight was postponed. Can you encounter it like a wonderful moment? Can you see that as wonderful?
Most participants look at me as if I am crazy. "That could be just like lying to myself," the say. "Even though I say that a scenario isn't so bad, it is still a bad circumstance. It will not go away." As we workshop this thought further, they concede that they are more likely to come up with creative responses when they are in a fantastic mood than when they are angry and upset. They also see how a frustrating situation could actually be a wonderful chance to learn something new or generate some creative thoughts. I'm going to attempt it..."
Moving on to cognitive development, de Tocqueville commented on how Americans have so little independence of mind but much freedom of conversation. It is a global phenomenon.
Starting from our schooldays, we're educated answers to questions we do not even have. We're led to believe that there is one right answer and that there's some expert somewhere that has figured out it. As we grow into adults, we're brainwashed by the media, the promotion messages and the governmental propaganda; we reside in the comfort of never having to exercise our wisdom. From the Middle Ages, religion forced humanity into a set of beliefs. In the current times, we accept the assumed wisdom of scientists and pseudo-scientists - such as economists - without much question.
Based on my research, my experiences and my expressions, I see human growth as a travel - a steep climb from dependence to independence to interdependence to transcendence. This lifetime journey begins at dawn, when we are dependent on our parents and other loved ones.
The process of getting physically independent is automatic with age. It is a natural part of growing up, and also for most of us it comes easily. As we pass through childhood and adolescence and become adults, many of us also figure out how to become financially independent - and that generally requires some concentrated work. We take up jobs, go from our parents' homes, get married and have children - steps toward accepting responsibility for our own lives in addition to for family members that are now hooked on us. For many, our quest for liberty ends here.
But being human isn't only about physical and material improvement. We will need to grow emotionally and intellectually. Emotionally, many of us remain dependent - allowing scenarios around us control our emotions. We can't claim to be independent when we allow ordinary events - traffic jams, forgetful partners, colleague missing deadlines at work, unreasonable customers - to trigger feelings of anger, frustration, helplessness or despair. If we're not masters of our emotions, can we actually be masters of our own destiny?
Emotional maturity or independence isn't about attempting to control what happens to people. Rather it's about how we react to what occurs to us. It is freedom of choice in how we react to adverse circumstances. prolife can lash out, as we may have done as kids, or we can opt to be reasoned and thoughtful and optimistic about moving ahead.
In my workshops on finding the true calling, I borrow a tool from 'The Art of Possibility' by Ben and Rosamund Zander. I ask participants to invoke the feeling of 'How Beautiful' whenever they are in a bad position. By way of example, imagine you're late to an important interview cause a flight was postponed. Can you encounter it like a wonderful moment? Can you see that as wonderful?
Most participants look at me as if I am crazy. "That could be just like lying to myself," the say. "Even though I say that a scenario isn't so bad, it is still a bad circumstance. It will not go away." As we workshop this thought further, they concede that they are more likely to come up with creative responses when they are in a fantastic mood than when they are angry and upset. They also see how a frustrating situation could actually be a wonderful chance to learn something new or generate some creative thoughts. I'm going to attempt it..."
Moving on to cognitive development, de Tocqueville commented on how Americans have so little independence of mind but much freedom of conversation. It is a global phenomenon.
Starting from our schooldays, we're educated answers to questions we do not even have. We're led to believe that there is one right answer and that there's some expert somewhere that has figured out it. As we grow into adults, we're brainwashed by the media, the promotion messages and the governmental propaganda; we reside in the comfort of never having to exercise our wisdom. From the Middle Ages, religion forced humanity into a set of beliefs. In the current times, we accept the assumed wisdom of scientists and pseudo-scientists - such as economists - without much question.
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