How much more can I take!?
I've had a whirlwind few days and really not sure how much emotional stress I can take! First off, let me say for the billionith time how much I loathe and despise everything about IF!!! There, got that off my chest...
Yesterday I had an appt with a gallbladder surgeon (same one who removed my liver tumor 10 years ago) and he said he's not certain I should have my gallbladder removed. He agrees not doing so could pose a problem if I am lucky enough to get pregnant, but on the other hand he doesn't see an urgency otherwise. As I am leaving my appt, I get a call from my aunt telling me my mom is having emergency surgery - WTF!?!?! - she was diagnosed a few weeks ago with Crohn's disease and apparantly had such intense pain and developed a large abscess/infection and needed surgery. She's doing ok now but she lives in CA and I'm in NY so being far from her and my family now is very hard and emotional. I considered flying out there but of course as wonderful timing would have it, I should be starting mini-IVF sometime within the next week. Yet again, IF puts my life "on hold" and keeps me from making plans. So now I feel like I'm in a crappy position here, and although my mom is ok with me not coming there, I feel really bad. At this point, we cannot afford anymore setbacks....we've had setbacks to starting IVF since September now and we need to get this show on the road. I'm so frustrated!!!!!!!!!
I need to catch up on everyone's journals.....been out of the loop the last few days. Hope everyone is well xoxoxo
Yesterday I had an appt with a gallbladder surgeon (same one who removed my liver tumor 10 years ago) and he said he's not certain I should have my gallbladder removed. He agrees not doing so could pose a problem if I am lucky enough to get pregnant, but on the other hand he doesn't see an urgency otherwise. As I am leaving my appt, I get a call from my aunt telling me my mom is having emergency surgery - WTF!?!?! - she was diagnosed a few weeks ago with Crohn's disease and apparantly had such intense pain and developed a large abscess/infection and needed surgery. She's doing ok now but she lives in CA and I'm in NY so being far from her and my family now is very hard and emotional. I considered flying out there but of course as wonderful timing would have it, I should be starting mini-IVF sometime within the next week. Yet again, IF puts my life "on hold" and keeps me from making plans. So now I feel like I'm in a crappy position here, and although my mom is ok with me not coming there, I feel really bad. At this point, we cannot afford anymore setbacks....we've had setbacks to starting IVF since September now and we need to get this show on the road. I'm so frustrated!!!!!!!!!
I need to catch up on everyone's journals.....been out of the loop the last few days. Hope everyone is well xoxoxo
Replies
So sorry about everything. IF really does get in the way of life. I hope your mom is doing better (my cousin suffers from Crohns ). You deserve a break and I\'m hoping that your cycle goes off well and ends with a BFP with no complications. Will be rooting you on! Xo
I had to miss my brother\'s WEDDING because of IF. It completely takes over our lives. Thankfully your mom is okay and I\'m sure your family understands. Hang in there!!!
I\'m sorry about your mom, that is hard. Thankfully she is ok and understands your staying here. After your cycle you can go for a nice long visit. For now you need to focus on you. Be there for her on the phone but try (although hard) to not stress too much. This is your time, your cycle, I can\'t wait to hear how great it is going to be.
Sorry about your mom. My FIL has chrons really bad and has had many many surguries. Its no fun. I am sure she understands you not being there! Glad to hear she is doing okay. I can not wait to hear about yoru cycle! Stay strong, this is it!
Big hugs hun, don\'t beat yourself up over missing stuff, but I understand the \"on hold\" feeling, my life has been on hold going on 7 years now! But TTC is important and it has a limited time frame, so hopefully your family understands! Glad your mom is okay!
Sue
XO
Ugh! Hope your mom is ok. I am sure she understands how important getting pregnant is to you and wants you to move forward with your cycle. IF does have a way of messing everything up though. Good luck this cycle :)
I\'m so sorry about your mom and you being so far away :-( That must feel awful! But i\'m sure she totally understands what all this stuff means to you. And sorry your surgeon didn\'t make you feel much better. If he understands the point of removing it incase you get preggo, and you\'re scheduled for a procedure to get preggo right now, then I would say that needs some urgency! Good luck and hoping there are NO MORE setbacks!
So sorry to hear about your mom, but glad she is doing well. IF is such a crazy thing, it takes over our lives completely. Hopefully your surgeon gives you the best advice for your health, and you can get that BFP and have zero worries.
Sorry to hear you are having so many setbacks and even more sorry about your mom situation. I really hope you get your cycle on and may it end on a BFP
Huge hugs. I recommend accupuncture for stress, could help sooth out some of the bumps. Glad to hear you are going for the mini IVF hurray! As for mom, she wants to be a grandma so she will understand. Feeling sad is normal, but know that she wants the best for you first and foremost.
I hope your mom is doing well. Best of luck with the mini IVF. Fingers are crossed for you.
I can\'t believe everything that is happening all at once. I really hope things turn around with a BFP on your cycle.
This sounds oh so similar to my life lately. Hopefully, this is your miracle cycle. Keeping my fingers crossed for you!