how do i know

how do i know if its my crazy head getting away from me or if im being realistic? i think i like to start trouble because i know i care more than she does. dont know how to deal with feelings and she definately cant talk. the last couple weeks been very very rough for us. im a very affectionate loving person and right now im being cold and hard and it s not natural so i dont feel good at all. need realize we were raised differently. just tired and stressed and dont wanna need.