how do I feel????
I have been debating all day whether to journal or not. I am in such a negative head space right now. I honestly know that this is not my issue but it has affacted me in such an intense way. I have come to rely on this site for so much that I don't get and don't ask of my friends and family. I am so disenheartened and saddened by recent events and i'm not really sure why.
It has been weighing heavily on my mind, am i such a fixer that I need to fix this?Or has it just taken some of the happy out of this experience. I guess maybe because it all seemed to come out of the blue that I am in shock.
I keep thinking that I should just let it go and get into a better place mentally but for whatever reason it won't let go of my mind.....why have I fixated on this?????
I have sabotaged myself this weekend....I know I am doing it but...... I go to food when I am in a bad place and i am afraid to go weigh in on tuesday. I can't wait for monday and yoga class I hope I can get this out of my head and get back to me again.
I think some of this is the disappointment from the rheumy visit and how things were left in the air (at least to me they were) I hope that after I see the respiratory doc on the 20th things will be more settled.
Things have not been all bad this weekend, my daughter is home and we went to "Rockstock" last night and saw the Doors live in concert....it was good but it was not quite the same without Jim Morrison.
We are having some friends over for dinner tomorrow.....I took some chicken out the other day to thaw and have for dinner and i couldn't get them apart so I had to thaw them all....so we have 9 chicken breasts thawed now so we decided to invite a few people over so we didn't have to eat chicken for a week....lol But that meant I had to get the house cleaned....I have a protective coating of dust that I have been collecting for awhile now and I guess i had to let it go. So I made a deal with Hubs...I will dust and vaccum and he will mop the floors.....so my part is done, now waiting for him to do his. Going to try a new recipe for zucchini "no crab" cakes....sounds yummy anyway.
I am hoping that after tomorrow maybe I will be able to put everything into perspective and get this negativity out of my head.
It has been weighing heavily on my mind, am i such a fixer that I need to fix this?Or has it just taken some of the happy out of this experience. I guess maybe because it all seemed to come out of the blue that I am in shock.
I keep thinking that I should just let it go and get into a better place mentally but for whatever reason it won't let go of my mind.....why have I fixated on this?????
I have sabotaged myself this weekend....I know I am doing it but...... I go to food when I am in a bad place and i am afraid to go weigh in on tuesday. I can't wait for monday and yoga class I hope I can get this out of my head and get back to me again.
I think some of this is the disappointment from the rheumy visit and how things were left in the air (at least to me they were) I hope that after I see the respiratory doc on the 20th things will be more settled.
Things have not been all bad this weekend, my daughter is home and we went to "Rockstock" last night and saw the Doors live in concert....it was good but it was not quite the same without Jim Morrison.
We are having some friends over for dinner tomorrow.....I took some chicken out the other day to thaw and have for dinner and i couldn't get them apart so I had to thaw them all....so we have 9 chicken breasts thawed now so we decided to invite a few people over so we didn't have to eat chicken for a week....lol But that meant I had to get the house cleaned....I have a protective coating of dust that I have been collecting for awhile now and I guess i had to let it go. So I made a deal with Hubs...I will dust and vaccum and he will mop the floors.....so my part is done, now waiting for him to do his. Going to try a new recipe for zucchini "no crab" cakes....sounds yummy anyway.
I am hoping that after tomorrow maybe I will be able to put everything into perspective and get this negativity out of my head.
Replies
Gosh, honey. I\'m sorry that I missed this. When you feel like you are a part of a family of friends and discord comes along it is disheartening. It gets even worse when others try to drag you into it. We all share energy whether it is negative or positive. I\'m sticking to the positive. Sure there are times when we feel negative and need to vent but that is getting the negative energy out. It is not directing it toward another person. Then to top it all off this energy is being spread in your safe environment.
The Doors, you and my hubby would get along great. He just loves them. If you could only see the dust on my bedroom furniture. Yikes!! I get the living room, but am pooped by the time I\'m done. Of course I\'m still trying to clean the old way, just with breaks, I see that I need to devise a new plan. Congrats on hubby helping, mine usually finds other jobs. lol He has cleaned a toilet only once since we\'ve been together. Even while I was pregnant.
Gosh, honey. I\'m sorry that I missed this. When you feel like you are a part of a family of friends and discord comes along it is disheartening. It gets even worse when others try to drag you into it. We all share energy whether it is negative or positive. I\'m sticking to the positive. Sure there are times when we feel negative and need to vent but that is getting the negative energy out. It is not directing it toward another person. Then to top it all off this energy is being spread in your safe environment.
The Doors, you and my hubby would get along great. He just loves them. If you could only see the dust on my bedroom furniture. Yikes!! I get the living room, but am pooped by the time I\'m done. Of course I\'m still trying to clean the old way, just with breaks, I see that I need to devise a new plan. Congrats on hubby helping, mine usually finds other jobs. lol He has cleaned a toilet only once since we\'ve been together. Even while I was pregnant.