How Alone I Really Am
I've been thinking a lot lately. I have come to realize how lonely I really am. I go to Penn State University, the number 1 party school in the country, and yet I haven't gone to one party. I've been going there for three semesters now, and I haven't made one good friend yet. There are some aquaintances, people who I just say hi to, and that's just about it. I live ar home, so I don't have any roommates or anything. A few of my good friends from high school have moved away, what I thought was my best friend doesn't contact me anymore. Sometimes when I get so tired of just sitting at home and feeling lonely , I make up random excuses to go walk around campus or something. Here's the thing, some people like being alone. Well this isn't me, I want to make new friends, I want to go out and have fun, I want to find that special one to spend the rest of my life with. I have the want and will to do these things, but fo some reason or another I can't let these feelings out. I don't know if I need to go to therapy, which I think I probably do. I just don't know how to go about telling my parents without it being awkward or embarassing.
Replies
Hello and a hug from Catydid over in Philadelphia.
Please read this book: Loneliness: Human Nature and the Need for Social Connection. ~ John T. Cacioppo & William Patrick. In it you will learn that we are wired to connect with others and that when we get isolated, actual changes take place in the brain that make it harder to get reconnected. It will give you ideas on how to overcome those brain changes.
Do you need therapy? Maybe. But maybe you\'re just dealing with these brain changes that will happen to anyone who gets isolated. It has helped me very much. You are much younger than I am (finished college long time ago), so you may need to connect with a therapist to learn how to get out of isolation. I\'d recommend cognitive behavioral therapy rather than traditional talk therapy. It teaches you how to work with the things you say to yourself and that is exactly the kind of therapy that will help when you\'re trying to change the brain.