Horrible Day

This has been a very bad day .  I have cried all day.  The loss of my son have overwhelmed me today.  I do not understand why God did not heal him.  I really believed he would be healed.  I miss him so much.  I just can't believe he is gone.  I am so thankful to know he is in Heaven but I miss not being able to talk to him or see him.  I had a thought last night as I watched the beautiful white flakes of snow falling if in Heaven if we would want to see snow God would grant it but you would not feel the cold only see the beauty of the white covering everything.  I love the beauty that God provided us here on earth from all the seasons and even in the winter when the leaves are all gone and as I used to tell the kids the trees were naked there was and is beauty in them.  I pray that God will grant me some kind of peace with this pain I feel in my heart.  I know I will see him again someday.  Like one of my other sons said and then he can take us on a tour and show us what he has been doing.  I love my boys, Kenny, Jeff, Brent, Shawn.  I miss you Kenny.