Hopelessness

Hi everyone, I am new to this group. I am not sure how it works yet. But, I am 51. I have bipolar 1 disorder, and I have not really done much of anything for 10 years. I am currently unemployed. I have only two friends, which are my father and sister. So, they don't really count. I have let myself go to such a state that I have every medical problem you can think of, from Chronic Kidney Disease, to Diabetes 2, to Peridontal Disease, to High Blood Pressure. I feel really hopeless right now, as it's usually a good day, if I shower and brush my teeth, and on a stellar day, I will go for a walk as well. But, I live in total isolation, and I don't see myself ever getting a job, as all of the people laid off because of the coronavirus will definitely be employed before me. My medication has really never leveled me out my entire life, and I just see my life at best working a manual labor job, not making enough money to survive and not having health insurance and getting old and ending up on the streets. At worst, I will run out of money in a year or two and wind up on the streets then if my father, and sister are unable to keep me. Which neither of them does, because I have had a psychotic episode and they don't feel safe around me. So, every day is filled with anxiety and hopelessness. Sorry this entry is so long. Any replies would be appreciated. I'm really just trying to find any reason to get out of bed in morning and anything that has worked for anybody else out there. As, I know several of you with bipolar, must have also reached the point of hopelessness in your lives as well. Thank you very much in advance.