Hopeless: An update.

Hello all, finally back on here after 4 years of being banned and forgetting this profile existed. I have a hard time posting any feelings, I've been made fun of and avoided because of my honesty, but I HAVE PROBEMS. I'm tired of trying to hide it. I have so much to deal with and when all your close friends turn their backs on you, what's to keep you from going insane? Anyone who knows me in person, my real life and not on here, would be shocked to death to hear and know all of this, and all that ive done and has happened. But I can't be the perfect person... I am 17 now, not the 14 year old i was but not the collected adult I could someday be either. Feels like I don't have a friend in the world most times, and there's just no way to fix this....