hopeless

Just feeling hopeless again, will i ever get the courage to leave? I cant live like this for the rest of my life, just waiting for him to find fault in something else.  He has been better behaved this week but im just waiting for the other shoe to drop, it always does.  Waiting for that moment to come that i know just what to do but it never seems to come, ive been wanting to leave for the past 5 years, and im still here, will the day ever come?!