Honesty

So today was a set back in a sorts. Something that happened 20 plus years ago has really bothered me and people judge me for it. That judgement has pushed me into some of the lies that have been told about my life. For being being judged is a really bad thing. It brings out the panic and the anxiety. And then when I try to explain I am being called the liar. I am being told I'm not truthful. Being honest if the absolute right thing to do but again there are days when I feel the honesty thing is over rated.