Holidays

This is the month that things get weird for me. My emotions are on a roller coaster ride and I have trouble keeping myself in check.  My sons birthday was the 25th.  He is 9 now.  I haven't seen him since he was a month old and I no longer get updates on him.  He is the reason/excuse for the temperament.  
This doesn't go away for some time.  The neighbors try to include me in as much as they can that I can tolerate.  Lesly knows why so she doesn't push me.  Love her!  I don't have the support I used to have.  I don't need people hovering over me just be my friend.  
I get very angry at Marie.  She broke her promise to me.  And there is absolutely nothing I can do about it.  I cry a lot.  I try not to think about that week Nickalous was born.  It's the worse time I have ever been through.  
I've been wondering how he is lately.  Weighing heavy on my head.

Replies

deleted_user
deleted_user

Not much I can say, except to let you know I\'m thinking about ya . . .
hzlnut
hzlnut

Thanks. Not much too say. Just need to voice it every couple of years. No one here to tell.... I\'ll get through it. I always do. Love Ya