Here We Go Again

I was at the video store last night right after I got off of work at 7 p.m. Picking out movies to watch on my day off today. I had been tired and kinda out of it all day at work. Just thinking it was stress and over-exertion. One minute I'm picking out movies, the next I'm being loaded up on a gurney. Ambulance again! Seems I had a seizure. I stayed in the e.r. until 11:30. They did a blood level check. My Dilantin level is fine. Blood pressure was a bit high. Now I may need meds for that. Great! Just what I need, more meds, and more hospital bills. I'm not even done paying the last bills. And it hasn't even been a year since that hospital visit. That was June 22, 2009. I'm just so angry. I don't see the point right now in staying sober. I try so hard to make it alone in this world and shit keeps piling up on me. Now matter how good and kind I am to people and try to stay positive, I can't seem to get ahead in this life. I know I'm always going to have bills and problems, but Jesus, do I have to have more outrageous medical bills to pay on top of the ones I haven't even paid off yet? Plus maybe another rx to add to my list?