Here I go again (1 year later)

Ok, so it has been one year and a day since I first made a journal entry on this site. I'm still as bad as ever.One thing has changed though. My wife has caught me drinking numerous times and has threatened to leave me if I don't stop.It hasn't helped because as I sit here and write this I am as drunk as a skunk. I feel bad but not bad enough to put down the beer I am holding.This is craziness. Why must I do this whole dance? I drink all afternoon and night and then pass out. I wake in the morning for work and commence beating myself up over it.