HEAVEN ON EARTH KIND OF DAY!
My son took me to Wrigley Field in Chicago, Illinois to see the Chicago Cubs play a baseball game yesterday for my up-coming 65 birthday. It was awesome. There is something inside of me that is crying tears of joy this morning. I am over-whelmed with happiness.
I fell to my knees thirty-five years ago as I was so filled with anger, hate, etc. and I didn't know what to do with it or how to deal with it. I was shown. Mini breakdown and mini break-though; mini breakdown and mini break-through; mini-breakdown and mini-break-through. Re-parenting myself day in and day out; letting go to the degree that I was able; accepting the good, the bad, and the ugly of me; becoming non-resistant and allow myself to be just where I was; embracing the pain and grieving so very much I never had; on and on and on and on.
But now I am getting moments of joy; happiness. I don't think it is coming from the outside and I am getting better at letting go of expectations from the outside; I believe it is coming from the inside. Layers and layers and layers, have been released and I can finally feel/experience the LOVE that I AM.
The joy of experiencing a 4 hr. drive with my son; the joy of the rain and the beautiful sunshine; the joy of the energy at the ballpark; the joy of laughing with strangers is unexplainable.
Acceptance of 'self' (flaws and all) has led me to acceptance of others (flaws and all). What a gift.
I think of my life this morning, my journey on the earthly plane and I would NOT change ANYTHING as it has brought me to a place of getting to experience moments of "peace on earth" and who would want more than that. I am graciously over-whelmed by this feeling.
Thank-you to my son who presented me with such a memorable day. When I walked out onto that ball field, all I could think of was my Dad as he had a chance to play for the Chicago Cubs when he was young but couldn't live his dream because he had three kids and another on the way! Travis said he felt my Dad and I know as well as my name is Vicki, he was with us yesterday!
xo
I fell to my knees thirty-five years ago as I was so filled with anger, hate, etc. and I didn't know what to do with it or how to deal with it. I was shown. Mini breakdown and mini break-though; mini breakdown and mini break-through; mini-breakdown and mini-break-through. Re-parenting myself day in and day out; letting go to the degree that I was able; accepting the good, the bad, and the ugly of me; becoming non-resistant and allow myself to be just where I was; embracing the pain and grieving so very much I never had; on and on and on and on.
But now I am getting moments of joy; happiness. I don't think it is coming from the outside and I am getting better at letting go of expectations from the outside; I believe it is coming from the inside. Layers and layers and layers, have been released and I can finally feel/experience the LOVE that I AM.
The joy of experiencing a 4 hr. drive with my son; the joy of the rain and the beautiful sunshine; the joy of the energy at the ballpark; the joy of laughing with strangers is unexplainable.
Acceptance of 'self' (flaws and all) has led me to acceptance of others (flaws and all). What a gift.
I think of my life this morning, my journey on the earthly plane and I would NOT change ANYTHING as it has brought me to a place of getting to experience moments of "peace on earth" and who would want more than that. I am graciously over-whelmed by this feeling.
Thank-you to my son who presented me with such a memorable day. When I walked out onto that ball field, all I could think of was my Dad as he had a chance to play for the Chicago Cubs when he was young but couldn't live his dream because he had three kids and another on the way! Travis said he felt my Dad and I know as well as my name is Vicki, he was with us yesterday!
xo
Replies
This is such a beautiful journal entry! Written by a beautiful woman, inside and out! Love you. So glad you had a wonderful day xxxxxx
I agree with Rosie wholeheartedly! Your self-work and mimi-breakthroughs has brought you to a place of serene acceptance that you si richly deserve. You are a welcome light to all of us here in DS. Keep accepting.
XOXOXO
This is a lovely and heartwarming story. It\'s good to see you in the light, as you have given so many others this same gift. What a kind gift from your son, the gift of sharing his time and love with you.