healing
I just wanted to share that my granddaughter Christina met my ex-husband, Eddie's father last night. I've written before about how before my son passed his father had tried to make amends to Eddie after several years (from the time he was 14) until about 5 years ago my ex hadn't seen or called Ed. When he did call to tell Eddie that he was sober for 9 years and had become a Christian & had apologized Ed had listened but wasn't ready to see him. After Eddie passed last year I had to locate my ex to tell him Eddie passed. Of course he was heartbroken, consumed with guilt, etc. He has wanted to meet Joshua & Christina, but they were angry that all these years he had hurt their Dad.
Christina decided to meet him & so we all went out to dinner last night. Christina was very nervous, but since she is expecting she is very interested in that side of the family now. Ken, me , the ex, Christina, her boyfriend & my DIL had dinner. Josh decided not to join us & that's OK. When he is ready, he's ready. The ex brought Christina roses & gifts for the other members of the family.We shared pics, stories & Larry explained that he was suffering with PTSD (from serving in Vietnam) & alcoholism & that was why he was never around & he apologized to her.
It was a positive visit. I think it was healing for all of us to forgive & let go of the anger. Driving home I was sad as I am somewhat jealous that Larry has other children, many of whom look so much like Eddie that it is disarming. As I shared these feelings with Ken, I looked up & on the overpass was a neon lit sign that said "ED". It was the "CLOSED" sign that indicated the weigh station was closed. But I said, "Look Ken, its Ed! He's reminding me I still have him with me." Now Ken, naysayer that he can be sometimes said, "that's the closed sign. The first few letters are out." Well, I know that, "Mr. Let's State the Obvious", but nonetheless I know what I was feeling & I know, what I know. It was Ed comforting me. I personally have driven that hiighway hundreds & hundreds of times & that sign has said closed or open, not ED! God can use a highway sign if he wishes. I'll take it!
So I embrace the healing in our extended family & I embrace the signs.
Love & peace to all my dear sisters, Linda
Christina decided to meet him & so we all went out to dinner last night. Christina was very nervous, but since she is expecting she is very interested in that side of the family now. Ken, me , the ex, Christina, her boyfriend & my DIL had dinner. Josh decided not to join us & that's OK. When he is ready, he's ready. The ex brought Christina roses & gifts for the other members of the family.We shared pics, stories & Larry explained that he was suffering with PTSD (from serving in Vietnam) & alcoholism & that was why he was never around & he apologized to her.
It was a positive visit. I think it was healing for all of us to forgive & let go of the anger. Driving home I was sad as I am somewhat jealous that Larry has other children, many of whom look so much like Eddie that it is disarming. As I shared these feelings with Ken, I looked up & on the overpass was a neon lit sign that said "ED". It was the "CLOSED" sign that indicated the weigh station was closed. But I said, "Look Ken, its Ed! He's reminding me I still have him with me." Now Ken, naysayer that he can be sometimes said, "that's the closed sign. The first few letters are out." Well, I know that, "Mr. Let's State the Obvious", but nonetheless I know what I was feeling & I know, what I know. It was Ed comforting me. I personally have driven that hiighway hundreds & hundreds of times & that sign has said closed or open, not ED! God can use a highway sign if he wishes. I'll take it!
So I embrace the healing in our extended family & I embrace the signs.
Love & peace to all my dear sisters, Linda
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