He as good as told me who he was, yet I ignored it

I've been thinking a lot about our "relationship" and I've realized that so much of the time I have not only excused some REALLY bad behavior, but I have also chosen to ignore the times when he isn't trying to manipulate or convince me I am crazy or defective--the times when the mask completely slips and he says exactly what he's thinking. And believe me it isn't anything positive. I've heard that he is sorry that he was the only stupid one who stuck around (referring to helping to take care of his children financially), that he will continue to do what he wants, when he wants, and with whomever he wants--he will not allow me, or anyone else, to control him, and most disturbingly this:
He asked me doesn't everybody feel this way: You know, you can feel the tension and rage building up until it feels like a pressure cooker and you have to let off steam. This is why he often erupts into unexplained rages or provokes fights just when everything seems most calm. After he "gets it out" he feels better, so he doesn't understand why everyone doesn't.
Should have listened to him instead of pretending he didn't mean the things he says.