Having a Hard Time Grief

This is My First Christmas without My Grandpa he passed away April 15th 2017 but it still feels like yesterday. My Grandpa helped My Mother raise  Me. I am having such a hard time this being my first Christmas with out him here physically but I know He is Her Spiritually I can Feel him and See The Signs He sends. I am 36 1/2 years old I never knew who my father was So My Grandpa was Always More like a Dad to Me. The last 6  years of his life My Husband and I took care of him helping My Grandma ( who was married to him for 65 years and is still with us today) He suffered a Brain stem stroke at the age of 90 then got vascular dementia. Grandpa was 96 years old When he passed away. I was there in the hospital room with him when he took his last breath. He said my name in a whisper just before he passed. I am having such a hard time with this. Thank You.