Harden Heart
I write this with a bit of a harden heart... I have no idea how to address my son consent questions about our family this Christmas.
I was really hoping that by this time my wife and I would have resolved enough of our issues that the holiday could be wrapped around family more than separation. I don’t blame her at all, I just wish the anger and bitterness and un-forgivingness could be set aside for a moment for the greater good, of course I also need to consider what the best is for her too. I know that may not be what I think.
It seems now that even when I am genuinely just trying to do the right thing, help if you will… it is wrong and I am trying to argue or take control, it can't just be an opinion or suggestion. In all fairness years of me doing just that is probably the reason now.
I said I would do what she wants, told her she could lead I will follow. Of course I will not be perfect, not make a mistake, maybe even go back and not catch and old habit… this IS a working progress.
I am doing and getting better daily. How can we ever mend, heal, move on from this if we don’t work at it.
My wife and I talked very calm and at length recently, (our son went to the ER) she talked with hope and about a future, just one step at a time. Now I do and/or something wrong and it regresses back. This breaks my heart!
I need peace, I seek our Lords guidance every day and I pray I will get it and blessings with my family...
I was really hoping that by this time my wife and I would have resolved enough of our issues that the holiday could be wrapped around family more than separation. I don’t blame her at all, I just wish the anger and bitterness and un-forgivingness could be set aside for a moment for the greater good, of course I also need to consider what the best is for her too. I know that may not be what I think.
It seems now that even when I am genuinely just trying to do the right thing, help if you will… it is wrong and I am trying to argue or take control, it can't just be an opinion or suggestion. In all fairness years of me doing just that is probably the reason now.
I said I would do what she wants, told her she could lead I will follow. Of course I will not be perfect, not make a mistake, maybe even go back and not catch and old habit… this IS a working progress.
I am doing and getting better daily. How can we ever mend, heal, move on from this if we don’t work at it.
My wife and I talked very calm and at length recently, (our son went to the ER) she talked with hope and about a future, just one step at a time. Now I do and/or something wrong and it regresses back. This breaks my heart!
I need peace, I seek our Lords guidance every day and I pray I will get it and blessings with my family...
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