Happy, yet lonely!!
Today I went to my saline sonogram and trial transfer. All is well with the ovaries and uterus!! No cyst, polyps, 1 fibroid but doc said "no worries" We just shelled out $1100 dollars for meds and will pay the rest of IVF next week. No backing out now!!! I am happy but its so hard to really tell your feelings to others because they don't get it! My feelings are weird but here they are
* I get so aggravated and resentful that I have to pay all this money to get pregnant! However, it is the reality and thank God he has blessed me with the money to pay for it.
**I am so scared! If it doesnt happen, we may not have another chance, well not soon.
**It's so hard to wrap my mind around this actually happening for me. I have spend so much time walking this road that I can't imagine it finally changing for me. This feeling is the one that I struggle with the most! When I read my journal entries from 2008 or 2007 I cry because I can't beleive that this is finally happening for me!! Okay here I go again!!
* I get so aggravated and resentful that I have to pay all this money to get pregnant! However, it is the reality and thank God he has blessed me with the money to pay for it.
**I am so scared! If it doesnt happen, we may not have another chance, well not soon.
**It's so hard to wrap my mind around this actually happening for me. I have spend so much time walking this road that I can't imagine it finally changing for me. This feeling is the one that I struggle with the most! When I read my journal entries from 2008 or 2007 I cry because I can't beleive that this is finally happening for me!! Okay here I go again!!
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