happy Saturday morning
feeling good this a.m.. which is a good start for me. this snow storm on east coast will miss me this weekend. but i am thinking the one on Tues. might give me my first snow. (in Pa.) which is o.k.. I have no appts. see my counselor on monday a.m. so will be home in case it gets bad on the roads. Still trying to figure out this new depression and loneliness. Most mornings i wake up with a doom feeling of something bad or thoughts of bad times already in my head. Even if i had good night evening before or well, good for me that is, quiet and kitties o.k., no manic or anxiety episodes, . some times thoughts are like u wake up and realize someone did pass it is not a dream, or someone is very ill, not going to make it,,and that dred you feel waiting for the call, and none of this had just happened or real, why do i feel this way. and when i have this it is so real. and nothing on my mind night before which would start these thoughts while i sleep either. this morning is one of the very few i feel not to bad. Even feel like running vac and maybe even do some of the paper work. Now that is not to say i will actually get to it...i tend to be day dreamer and my ADD does pose problem. who knows i could still be here hours from now reading or posting. good intentions. Does any one else wake up to doom thoughts when nothing is really wrong at the time? i sleep good also...kitties all around me,,,, a good 7-8 hours. try to watch comedy reruns before bed so i have good thoughts. laughter rather than so much bad stuff or news. i wake up with gut feeling something wrong every day. maybe it is stuff in me from child hood, marriage abuse. fear from house broken into few yrs ago or an assault. but it is not on my mind when i go to bed. it is more of a grieving feeling like you have when someone you cared about has passed. my houses is locked tight at night. keep some night lights on since house broken into...it is not that kind of feeling. it is not fear. Anyone else have these feelings when they wake up or similiar feelings and not know why?
Replies
I get morning depression so can understand you feeling better as the day goes on and feeling shit in the morning. i have felt disappointed that I was still alive. It might be bad dreams?
darkenedheart: i am good at remembering my dreams. almost like a book and next night continue the story. but i go to sleep with nothing bad on my mind. but seldom do i wake up with out this dreary dreadful feeling. i slept good, kitties all around me. this is good for me compared to how i have been already. awake for days... I even started to only watch comedy\'s before bed. thinks i can actually laugh at. still have same dred in a.m. i have talked to counselor about this also. Only thing that breaks these thoughts is just get up..no matter what time it is. If i lay thoughts just race thru my mind...so if you see me on here middle of night, that is why... at first counselor thought it goes bk to 3rd shift job all those many yrs. Or i was so busy working two jobs, i was exhausted and now since retired not busy enough ??? who knows. had meds also to try to shut down while i sleep..did not help...still work up with same feeling. very few times, i wake up with out this. thanks for y our reply.