Happy Dolphins
My motto about exercise has been, for the last 6 years: "You never regret it." It feels more important than ever to get those endorphins or as we call 'em, Happy Dolphins. I know, I know, you probably don't like to shift gears, leave the house, and get all sweaty any more than I do. Or think I do. But it makes just a cosmic difference in my body chemistry and general outlook. For the past week or so I've been too busy (?!) to get in a run. Result: weepy, sleepy, blue. Today I dragged my sorry butt out the door, started slowly, and finished a four mile run (quite a bit later) feeling mah-velous. You never regret it. Sure I thought a lot about Andy on the way. And about Byron, the one left behind. But the positive glow of the exercise and the general UP of the whole thing reminded me of how much we have to live for.
On a more complicated note, my brother's in-laws committed suicide together on Sunday. If you live in Milwaukee you may have seen this on the news. They wanted to go together and were facing their elderly years, and felt that they had to do it before they no longer had a choice.
I can tell you that it has given me a lot to think about. Death itself is not the frightening dark void. I know they're 'ok'. But I do feel for my SIL who suddenly has no parents. And while I honor the right to choose I feel that it represents just one point on the wide spectrum of human experiences. From those who fight to live one more day to those who end their lives. From those who cannot conceive to those who abort. From those who lose a child to those who abuse a child. None of it is fair or makes sense. I don't look for logic or divine sense.
I do feel sure that no one who loses a child (or loved one) or who faces heartbreak of any kind on that major scale (one's own illness or loss included) deserves it. There is no meaning. I don't say this in a blackhearted sense, just acceptance of chaos. The universe is chaotic to me. The parts we can control are tiny. This is why it is SO important to be kind to each other. It's all we've got. Love and kindness, along the way. We can give life such purpose.
Extra thank you's to all of you tonight, for opening your hearts to me and to each other. Yup, that's what I'm talkin' bout. : } <3
On a more complicated note, my brother's in-laws committed suicide together on Sunday. If you live in Milwaukee you may have seen this on the news. They wanted to go together and were facing their elderly years, and felt that they had to do it before they no longer had a choice.
I can tell you that it has given me a lot to think about. Death itself is not the frightening dark void. I know they're 'ok'. But I do feel for my SIL who suddenly has no parents. And while I honor the right to choose I feel that it represents just one point on the wide spectrum of human experiences. From those who fight to live one more day to those who end their lives. From those who cannot conceive to those who abort. From those who lose a child to those who abuse a child. None of it is fair or makes sense. I don't look for logic or divine sense.
I do feel sure that no one who loses a child (or loved one) or who faces heartbreak of any kind on that major scale (one's own illness or loss included) deserves it. There is no meaning. I don't say this in a blackhearted sense, just acceptance of chaos. The universe is chaotic to me. The parts we can control are tiny. This is why it is SO important to be kind to each other. It's all we've got. Love and kindness, along the way. We can give life such purpose.
Extra thank you's to all of you tonight, for opening your hearts to me and to each other. Yup, that's what I'm talkin' bout. : } <3
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