Hanging in there

A couple of good days in a row with the exercise.  Getting better on the water.  Food is still just OK.  Went to the Y yesterday and this am.  I HATE getting up at 5:45am.  But I find that getting my exercises out of the way helps me make it through the day.  Yesterday did elyptical for 35 min and then upper body weights and stretching.  Today, did 35 min on elyptical and lower body weights and stretching.   Have been working from home everyday and thank God, getting some things done.  Sucks that I was so far behind that I became SO unproductive.  Takes forever to get back on track- sorting into piles, putting bills and estimates and inventories together before I can even begin working on them.  So it has taken me a lot of time spent just to get organized so that I can get stuff done.  (Seems the effort to get caught up is SO much more than the effort to just keep it that way.)  And there is that mental thing about not knowing where to start in the first place.  But I can see my floor now, sort of.  Will have to dust and vacuum this weekend in here.  That will make me feel better. I have OB/GYM appointment this afternoon.  I hate going there.  And it has been years.  I should know better since having HPV about 15+ years ago that this is not something to full around with.  I had stage 3A (precancer) cells.  Caught and treated.  Have to go and get a mammogram soon.  Another thing I HATE.  I have to just quit being a baby and just deal with it.  But there is also the fear.  Fear that they find something wrong, even when there is no reason to fear.   Paul is out planting flowers, AGAIN.  Painting in sunroom is done.  But now he is sanding and re-varnishing window trim.  I want to put the plants and my furniture back.  I want to park my car in the garage again.  I want the clutter to go away.  Ugh!    David is done school on Thursday.  He has been pretty good this week.  I think Paul is taking him fishing this Saturday.   Frustrated at my progress with my weight, but no one to blame but myself.  Still dreaming of going down a size in my pants.  Still dreaming of "skinny jeans."  The key for me is exercise (10,000 steps) and watching my food.  I know this.  So I am going to try to keep with it.