Guilt

Sometimes I feel guilty for having put my parents through pain. I know I made them suffer. I think I might have even made them feel like they failed as parents. They deserve so much more. Because of this guilt I hide my feelings from them sometimes. I figure that they're going through their own struggles and that mine are nothing compared to what they've gone through. But then a therapist once told me that if my dog was feeling pain wouldn't I want to know it? It made me think that of course I would. I would want to know because I love her and I would want to make her feel better. I try to voice my pain but I've made it such a habit not to. I've been on one end of the spectrum for so long that it's difficult to go to the other side. I'm taking very slow baby steps.