Granddaughters Rehabilitation Center Hockey Player & More

First of all, 2 of the people I did not get ahold of at my therapist’s office did eventually call me back.   The one that’s acting weird called me from work the next day.  I was friendly, she was OK but it’s just not like it was and I have absolutely no clue.  I told her of all the upcoming events and dates & times.  She said her son was not seeing his therapist anymore (really mine too but she does not know that) and I did not ask if she was seeing anyone.  Who knows?  It would just make me feel funny if she was seeing my therapist and I didn’t know about it.  She did say her husband lost his job – gets severance for 1 month and may get rehired.  I hope that never happens to us again.  It’s happened about 10 times to us and my husband didn’t get severance or anything.  The jobs ended and everything ended.  I don’t think she understands but I would not like to be in their shoes ever again.  The whole thing scares me because we’ve been through it so many times!  Please, no – God – keep my husband employed.  Thank you.  The other friend called me back in a couple days but said nothing about organizing her house.  She said I forgot some clothes to take.  I told her she didn’t say to take them and I wouldn’t do that.  She said she’ll go through stuff and have them for me.  Sure … she’s been saying that for years and it never happens.  She said how she misses her sister (my best friend who died of breast cancer) and her Dad and said how she’s had so many losses.  Well, so I have!  Much more than her but she just doesn’t get it.  But I just listened to her.  She hung up by saying she’ll call me back when she’s in her car (she was shopping) but did she?  No.  I used to get upset about it but I don’t anymore.  What good does it do?  Absolutely none! This afternoon we went to my granddaughter’s rehabilitation center where a professional hockey player was there and to have snacks and watch the professional hockey game.  It was really cool.  I brought my camera and took lots of pictures.  I even got my son who is here (he’s an avid sports fan) to come for a little while.  My daughter thought it was funny how I thought the hockey player was cute and I talked to him pretty much and took pictures.  I told her I’m not shy.  I just love to play and interact with the kids, get excited about things, cheer, etc.  My husband is so quiet and just sits there.  It’s like he’s just my shadow but I love being outgoing, friendly, sun-shiney and such.  It makes me happy – especially to make others happy.  My granddaughter wanted me to sit next to her a lot, gave me so many hugs & kisses and so many “I missed you, Nana!” as usual.  It makes me feel so good but I still wonder why she needs so much love.  She’s certainly not in a lack of it.  I guess I just need to enjoy it while it’s here and hope it continues for a very, very long time.  My brother-in-law was married 4 times.  His 3rd wife had a daughter he helped raise when she was little.  And as it turns out she works there.  As soon as I came in we hugged and were so excited to see each other as it’s been a while.  She said she saw my picture and she said in all these years I haven’t changed one bit.  I haven’t aged a day.  That made me feel real good.  I do look a lot younger, and act a lot younger, than my age.  Many people think I’m “Mom” to my grandkids when I’m actually “Nana.”  I think my daughter’s getting used to it as long as they know who the real Mom is.     It was hard for me to be there at first.  Especially because we were in the room where the plaques were in memory of my best friend who died.  I took my son over to see them and I told him it makes me want to cry.  How she can’t see any of this.  But then I said, “Well, maybe she can see it all.”  He nodded.  So I just tried to get into my grandkids, the activities going on, my kids cousin and the hockey player to get my mind off of it.  It worked but I still feel sad she’s not here with us anymore.  It’s so ironic how all the places her parents chose was this one where my granddaughter is now.  So weird how fate happens like that.  And, she loved kids! So it turned out to be a real nice day today because I was with people.  I was able to be my happy, cheerful, helping self.  I need so much more of that.  I’m so bored in my life and this was very uplifting.  I love to be needed and wanted!  I did buy a lot this weekend.  It makes me feel so much better but I know it’s not good.  It fills up that empty hole.  I was doing good but kinda blew it these last few days.  But then again, it gives me something to do because I just hate this boredom.  That’s uplifting in it’s own way and when you don’t get it in other ways you need to find it how you can.