Got a lot done today
06/ 12/ 11
I got a lot of work done today. I fixed some problems with my game demos on my website and I think I am ready to re-launch it soon. Once I've done that it will be time to get back to job hunting. I know that it sounds dumb but I feel like all the stress in my life will just melt away once I get a job designing videogames. Videogames have gotten me through a lot. I doubt I would still be here if not for my will to get a degree in game design. Once I get hired that will be a huge weight off of my shoulders.
My brother paid us a visit today. I feel horrible writting this down, but I really feel like I never loved him like brothers should. I feel like he has always been a negative character in my life and I always feel strange when he is around. Not many people can make me really mad, like hurt someone mad, but he is the only one who can. We are just such opposite people that I try to avoid him when he is home most of the time. I hope god can forgive me for how I feel about him.
I still haven't asked the girl at my work out. GOD she is cute! When she put her arm around me the other day I just about went crazy. I couldn't move or do anything, I never can. Girls have tried to hug me or hold my hand before and I can never do much of anything back. I just get really choked up with emotion and freeze. Its because the two sides of my mind are fighting like crazy when a girl comes in contact with me. One side wants to just grab her and hold her like there is no tomorrow while the other wants to push her off and go back to work. I can't afford to keep freezing like this, one side has to win at some point.
As far as my goals go I am still going strong. I was tempted a few times today but I made it through alright. Still free of sweets and chips. I feel good about that at least. Like I said, a lot got done today. What was not done is what is haunting my mind though.
I got a lot of work done today. I fixed some problems with my game demos on my website and I think I am ready to re-launch it soon. Once I've done that it will be time to get back to job hunting. I know that it sounds dumb but I feel like all the stress in my life will just melt away once I get a job designing videogames. Videogames have gotten me through a lot. I doubt I would still be here if not for my will to get a degree in game design. Once I get hired that will be a huge weight off of my shoulders.
My brother paid us a visit today. I feel horrible writting this down, but I really feel like I never loved him like brothers should. I feel like he has always been a negative character in my life and I always feel strange when he is around. Not many people can make me really mad, like hurt someone mad, but he is the only one who can. We are just such opposite people that I try to avoid him when he is home most of the time. I hope god can forgive me for how I feel about him.
I still haven't asked the girl at my work out. GOD she is cute! When she put her arm around me the other day I just about went crazy. I couldn't move or do anything, I never can. Girls have tried to hug me or hold my hand before and I can never do much of anything back. I just get really choked up with emotion and freeze. Its because the two sides of my mind are fighting like crazy when a girl comes in contact with me. One side wants to just grab her and hold her like there is no tomorrow while the other wants to push her off and go back to work. I can't afford to keep freezing like this, one side has to win at some point.
As far as my goals go I am still going strong. I was tempted a few times today but I made it through alright. Still free of sweets and chips. I feel good about that at least. Like I said, a lot got done today. What was not done is what is haunting my mind though.
Replies