Goal Updates
I have been MIA for the past few weeks. Been struggling with some personal things and working on myself. I have been doing okay weight wise. I didn't change my goal weight from 115lbs because I would still be okay if I got down to that weight but just happy staying in the 115-125 range. It is more difficult to maintain then I originally thought it would be. I struggle from time to time eating enough calories to maintain the weight. I have gained about 1.5 lbs since I started to maintain. It is hard to see the number on the scale go up but I also realize that it is okay to gain/loose a few lbs from time to time with maintaining. I am still eating the same way and working on making sure I portion everything out. I am proud of myself for actually eating more fruits and veggies then I have in the past. I have been slacking on the working out lately been making other things a bigger priority so that is what I want to work on this week doing at least 2 30 min workouts.
I started back to school about 2 weeks ago. Have one class, history this semester. I normally am not interested in history but have actually found it interesting. So far class is going good and I have a goal of this week sitting down and working on mapping out a timeline for getting my two papers that are due for the class done in a timely manner. I am just trying to take it one day at a time. I have two semesters and an internship left then I will have my BSN:)
I have been proud of myself I have always cross stitched in the past but never did the sewing always had my mom finish those projects for me. This time I have done it all myself with a little guidance from a friend. I finished cross stitching the pattern and put a sweet pillow together for one of my nieces. I also have cross stitched quilt squares and with the help of my friend put together my first baby quilt. It is not perfect but for a first attempt looks great and I worked really hard and learned a lot from it. I am currently working on the squares for my next baby quilt which is for my 16 year old niece who is having my great nephew in May. I still coming to terms with her being pregnant at 16 but is not my great-nephews fault and I will love him just for that and I feel he deserves something special.
It has been a few weeks since I called my mom out on not calling me when she is close to visit and not calling me period. I told her how I felt and that I felt neglected and long story short I didn't get the response I was thinking a parent would give at hearing that news. In the weeks following nothing has changed and nothing has improved. I am feeling really hurt, lonely and not sure how to go from here. I am hoping in the coming days I will work through this but it hurts feeling like an outsider in my family and not having my parents to lean on. It makes it even harder having these feeling when I am trying to figure out if having children is a good idea for my husband and I. I look at our family dynamics and problems and really makes me question if it is responsible thing to do to bring another life into this madness. Guess that is all for now thanks for letting me speak freely and if any one reads this thanks for taking the time to read my update :)
I started back to school about 2 weeks ago. Have one class, history this semester. I normally am not interested in history but have actually found it interesting. So far class is going good and I have a goal of this week sitting down and working on mapping out a timeline for getting my two papers that are due for the class done in a timely manner. I am just trying to take it one day at a time. I have two semesters and an internship left then I will have my BSN:)
I have been proud of myself I have always cross stitched in the past but never did the sewing always had my mom finish those projects for me. This time I have done it all myself with a little guidance from a friend. I finished cross stitching the pattern and put a sweet pillow together for one of my nieces. I also have cross stitched quilt squares and with the help of my friend put together my first baby quilt. It is not perfect but for a first attempt looks great and I worked really hard and learned a lot from it. I am currently working on the squares for my next baby quilt which is for my 16 year old niece who is having my great nephew in May. I still coming to terms with her being pregnant at 16 but is not my great-nephews fault and I will love him just for that and I feel he deserves something special.
It has been a few weeks since I called my mom out on not calling me when she is close to visit and not calling me period. I told her how I felt and that I felt neglected and long story short I didn't get the response I was thinking a parent would give at hearing that news. In the weeks following nothing has changed and nothing has improved. I am feeling really hurt, lonely and not sure how to go from here. I am hoping in the coming days I will work through this but it hurts feeling like an outsider in my family and not having my parents to lean on. It makes it even harder having these feeling when I am trying to figure out if having children is a good idea for my husband and I. I look at our family dynamics and problems and really makes me question if it is responsible thing to do to bring another life into this madness. Guess that is all for now thanks for letting me speak freely and if any one reads this thanks for taking the time to read my update :)
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