Goals

I want to be able to feel emotions. One day I want to feel normal around a man. Instead of fucking I want to know how it feels to make love and not have to try and fake it. Oh and most important I want to believe I deserve it. All good goals to shoot for. Should add I should be sober during for all of the above. Once I drink my thoughts are all over. 

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funrun13
funrun13

Emotions are weakness. I am no longer wanted them. I want a partner, female or male. I no longer care about love just best friend and someone to be here for me and make me feel happy with life. I want to be more girlie instead of always sporty and tomboy. Need to probably volunteer to make myself feel better. I have a gift for making others feel good about themselves. I am proud I rarely give two thoughts about childhood shit anymore. Past is past and wrongs are done to people daily. I am a strong person because of it, If I feel this confident when manic then it is in me all the time I just need to learn to pull it to like another personality. BP can be a gift if you know how to manipulate it. I am enjoying the stone face today. Very manic though. Haven\'t slept in almost 48 hours. Had racing crazy thoughts but my sensible side stopped me.