getting to the top
I thought this year was going to be my best year ever. Finally, I was getting work and catching up on my bills. I didn't feel depressed anymore. I looked at everything as if it was just a minor obstacle that needed to be overcome. I started dating again.
But then things didn't work out. Work slowed, my machine that is my main income broke down. The repairs costs were way more than I had. Although I started dating, I didn't meet a woman that I clicked with.
So, I am trudging on. Taking work to give me some cash flow, but not nearly enough to cover all my bills. I borrowed the money to fix my machine. I hired a girl to help me advertise my business and began internet advertising. But my machine has again broken. The part I need this time is double what the last repairs cost.
Both my checking accounts are overdrawn. I am getting 10 to 20 calls a day from creditors. Deposits I am taking in from one job are going to cover remaining costs from the previous job and keep food and (hopefully) the electric on.
I have been trying to put 110% into work. But I get tired and frustrated. I have lost nearly 20 lbs because I am too hot to eat, too tired to cook, too broke to go to the grocery, and too blue to try to quit smoking and take better care of myself.
I am not giving up though. I am cutting down on cigarettes if I can't quit. I am resting as much as I can. I have a friend who wants to partner with me in my business (but not until Jan. maybe) and the girl in the office, who is very cute, btw, offered to help me see how my credit score is and the possibility of financing a new machine.
It is just hard because my hopes were high and I saw an end to my financial woes. Yesterday I thought that if there is a god, he sure as heck doesn't like me.
I have to be the person I need to be to be happy and successful. I can't remember things. So I should quit smoking, leave my vices alone and eat better.
But then things didn't work out. Work slowed, my machine that is my main income broke down. The repairs costs were way more than I had. Although I started dating, I didn't meet a woman that I clicked with.
So, I am trudging on. Taking work to give me some cash flow, but not nearly enough to cover all my bills. I borrowed the money to fix my machine. I hired a girl to help me advertise my business and began internet advertising. But my machine has again broken. The part I need this time is double what the last repairs cost.
Both my checking accounts are overdrawn. I am getting 10 to 20 calls a day from creditors. Deposits I am taking in from one job are going to cover remaining costs from the previous job and keep food and (hopefully) the electric on.
I have been trying to put 110% into work. But I get tired and frustrated. I have lost nearly 20 lbs because I am too hot to eat, too tired to cook, too broke to go to the grocery, and too blue to try to quit smoking and take better care of myself.
I am not giving up though. I am cutting down on cigarettes if I can't quit. I am resting as much as I can. I have a friend who wants to partner with me in my business (but not until Jan. maybe) and the girl in the office, who is very cute, btw, offered to help me see how my credit score is and the possibility of financing a new machine.
It is just hard because my hopes were high and I saw an end to my financial woes. Yesterday I thought that if there is a god, he sure as heck doesn't like me.
I have to be the person I need to be to be happy and successful. I can't remember things. So I should quit smoking, leave my vices alone and eat better.
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