Germany

I took 3 years of German in High School. I studied the culture, and fell in love with it right away.So, when Taz was filling out her 'Dream Sheet' for the military, she asked me where I would love to live. I told her...Germany.A part of me chose that because I really did think it would be neat to live there, in another country, soaking up a brand-new culture, having a brand-new life, a great adventure.......and another part of me chose it because I was for sure that she would never get sent to a place like that.Taz called me two days ago...and is being stationed in Germany come November of this year.I did not mean to start crying. I know that she wanted me to be excited because this was supposed to be my dream come true. But I don't think that anyone would really be excited about hearing that their true love is going overseas. It's never a 'happy' thing, and I wish she would have realized that before freaking out on me.So, for the past two days we have been talking about things...She wants me to move to Germany with her. Well, I told her when she first joined the military that no matter where she may go that I would follow. But, at the same time (I am ready to keep that promise), there are things that are holding me back.One is the complication of the Process. A passport is easy to get and would only take me about a month to receive. But it's the Work Visa that's nearly impossible to get. First, I would need to have a job offer in Germany. Then I would have to fill out the application for the Work Visa, and then present to the Germany Embassy representative IN PERSON. That would require me driving to Boston or Atlanta, or even Washington DC.The other issue is...my relationship.While things with Taz and myself are fine...to me...this trip is a HUGE commitment to make for someone who is just a 'girlfriend'. Marriage has been on my mind a lot lately. I mean, it bothers me that she is so terrified of marriage, it bothers me that I have proposed 3 times already with nothing to show for it...it bothers me that my best friend has gotten married and now her little brother has proposed to his g/f all before she has even mentioned putting forth any effort to marry me >.<She has a ring...a beautiful ring for me. It's just being held until she is ready to give it to me. But, what I'm saying is that I don't want to go all the way to another country with the possibility that she could just decide not to be with me anymore, dump me, and now suddenly I'm alone in a foreign country. You know what I mean?That, and, getting married would help me get to Germany.I could get a tiny bit of benefits through the military, be able to transfer with her to Germany, and, because she has right to work in another country, that would also provide me with my working visa. I mean, I may not know all the details on certain things...but I still have some months to figure it out. But yeah......I feel distressed, lost, sad, lonely...and just all-around scared. What should I do?