Fuck my life
Got to work early so if I don't get done with this than so be it.
I'm tired of being compared to people half my age since I was an infant and never did a fucking thing in my life before I was 45 years old. Bitch please. When I was their age I ran circles around them.
It makes no sense to say it can wait 2 days to get the car to a garage to patch or plug a nail she picked up in the park we live in. It's dangerous. Wtf am I doing letting her drive it like that? You know? If you drive normal and let me know when the cars indicator says the tire is low, then I'll put air in it.
I'm tired of working my fucking ass off so fucking bad then the new person you meet thinks you never done shit in your fucking life before they met you. I used to work on a construction site 5 and 6 days a week and still came home to work on my own house remodel in my late 30's. Now I'm just fucking tired and sick. I lost toes because I got an owey on them and they get infected and have to be removed. One of them split into 2 toes and was removed 2 days literally after getting a blister so don't think its my negligence.
I'm just tired of people thinking I should work and have the energy of a 20 year old on fiucking crack. If so, then let me do fucking crack.
Happy fucking birthday to me.
Replies
I’m really sorry u r feeling so bad and not having a good night. I hope u will feel better soon. Just keep doing the best u can. U r doing great and hang in there and don’t give up. U r worth it. Hugs
My best isn't good enough. Never has been.
who is judging you here none of us so we are here for some love and support.....I am a major messed up person but I try to present that which is inside me in some familiar ways that others will like.....if you have the goal of alienating everyone here there or everywhere you will...if the goal is to build some nice friends who want to talk and join in your joys that means sharing those joys which I had thought was something you did with the going thru job search and getting this new job,....anyway life in the world we live in is never known what tomorrow holds....you have to want to reach tomorrow though.....I hope this suicidal idea you are going thru will pass.....
It's passing but it comes up at times. I really don't know who I really am. I went through EMDR therapy which was illegal and dangerous from the first therapist that started it with me, then I barely went half way through cognitive therapy. I am who I am. Accept me or not. That's not my problem. Just a sense of my foundation. No one seems to like the strong minded person all the way. That's why we tend to be alone.
Before when I was on here, it was different. I went through a dozon or more accounts because I kept getting banned. I returned after being absent from here since 2015.
to keep from being banned you gotta be a nice guy here....you can bang your drum about your problems as loud as you want and nobody will ban you but bang someone else's drum about something that upsets them and then they report you as being mean then the banner comes to knock you out of here....
I never did that before. I used to be really bad mentally. I didn't get the help I really needed until 2016.
We have to stop trying to please the un-pleasable. If your wife makes poor decisions like nails in the tire, the thing that will change that is her suffering the consequences.
Being so angry is bad for your heart and your body. My interest here is in helping you find a way to live a peaceful and content life.