Frustrated

It is 1:20 am.  I went to bed at 10 and was dozing off when Joe came to bed.  Since I was awakened, I decided to go to the bathroom.  When I got up, my nose started to run and I began sneezing - non stop!  We have 10 people coming for dinner so I am a bit concerned.  I really don't want to sneeze into anyone's dinner!

About 4 times a year, Joe plans a menu and cooks. I am the sous chef and entertainer.  He calls it his 'What the Heck is He Cooking Now?' dinner.  He chooses a theme - this time it is 'What are the simple folk eating?'.  The menu consists of old recipes and ingredients e.g. a bean dish, beef cheek stew, 100 year old bread, corn cob soup etc.  I think he is doing 9 dishes - small plate.  In the past he has cooked weird stuff such as alligator, camel meat, quail eggs.  The themes vary.  We traveled a lot so have done Italian food, South American, Icelandic, Russian etc. A couple of the folks who come are picky eaters but they come anyway and will try a bite!  Wayne asked if the tiny birds were pigeons.  They were quail. We have a lot of pigeons in the neighbourhood.  We assured him that it would be too labour intensive to catch and gut them!

On a more somber note, my 16 year old great nephew who died from an overdose was buried on Sunday.  I didn't go to the funeral because his grandma (my niece) thinks I am the bitch from Hell.  Wendy understands.  The family specializes in drama and it would have been incredibly tense with me there.  As it was, she warned her brother that if he caused a fuss, she would have him kicked out.  I am not the only one on their 'unwanted relatives' list!  I talk and text with Wendy daily and she seems to be doing well - as well as can be expected for a mom who has just lost her only child.

On Saturday, a friend asked if I wanted to do a day trip to Edmonton (3 hour drive each way).  She has a rental property and was going to do a walk through.  I said yes but had to be home before 8 pm as we had a concert to attend.  She assured me that it would be no problem.  So we went, met Tiina, my daughter-in-law and went shopping and for lunch.  I went to Tiina and Andrew's when she did her walk through.  She took a bit longer than expected but I would still be back by 8 - or that was what we thought.  When we got on the highway, it was snowing and blowing and it got slippery. Then we saw vehicle in the ditches and then we were slowed to a crawl.  The further we went, the more cars, trucks and semis were in the ditch.  I soon realized I wasn't getting home by 8 so told Joe to find someone to go with him.  My friend Lorraine was happy to accompany him.

By the time we got to Red Deer, which is half way home, it was about 7 pm.  We decided it was safer to get a hotel room and stay the night.  However, when we went to check in, the girl at the desk had a pained look on her face.  All the hotels in Red Deer were full.  So we went for supper and a beer.  We knew we were going to have an uncomfortable night so we stayed at the restaurant until closing time and then parked the car by an all night service station and hunkered down.  Luckily we had warm clothes and blankets.  It wasn't comfortable but we did sleep for awhile.  When we woke up for a bathroom break, the snow and wind had stopped so decided to drive the rest of the way, very slowly.  We arrived home at 5 am.  The highway was still slippery but there was next to no traffic so it was okay.  We agreed that our day trips would be in good weather from now on!

I have been struggling with depression since losing Jack and Tucker.  When I go down the black hole, I think of all the people who have gone.  I am reminded that it won't be long until I join Lisa and friends and relatives who have predeceased me.  But am coping and will be okay. 

The twins will be celebrating their 6th birthday on the 12th.  I wish we could be there with them.  Since they are in school now, we are not going to Ottawa until Christmas.