I have three weeks to write a paper of three pages using material that I already gathered a year ago. 
At the moment I find myself in the last week. 
The first page still isn't filled.
Every sentence costs me. It's all in my head but I have to force it out so violently that it hurts. I start to feel extremely anxious. I get restless, fidgety. It feels like there's a weight on my chest. My breathing is heavier. And when the sentence is finally there, a wave of freight runs through me because, what should be the next one? I'm listening to loud music with a lot of beat to somehow keep me from wanting to curl up in my bed and hide. I try to talk strength into myself but the feeling that I'm not able to do this is nearly overwhelming. It chokes me. I can't focus. Every thought I try to express black on white immediately gets confused. It doesn't matter how badly I want to do this. It doesn't matter that I would usually get it done within a day. It doesn't matter that I never failed on similar papers before. It doesn't matter I get all the support I could wish for.
My mind is being shut down by the incoming season. 
I can't stand it. I hate to experience this happening again. It's so vital to who I am. Yet it is quickly slipping away from me now. I don't know if I should cry or hit something or keep trying or just go to sleep and let it happen. I'm outraged and angry, frustrated and frightened. I feel lonely in my efforts. Whoever decided to give me a brain and then forbid me from using it is cruel being indeed.