Friday the 13th was the best day of my life

Severals days ago, the day after my birthday, my wife said, we need to talk. She proceeded to inform me, that after 23 years of marriage, and two children ages 19 and 5, that she wanted a divorce. We have had rough patches, but this was a surprise. We had just had dinner the night before with our 5 year old. She had gifts for me, and the following day, she wants a divorce. Wow! Heartbroken, depressed, scared, desperate, crushed, to name a few. I have been crying like a baby for two weeks. Xanax and effexor are the drugs of choice, and how I am currently making it through the days, barely. She said she loves me, but is no longer "in love" with me. She said, we just grew in two different directions. I tend to be quiet and like to be at home, and she wants to be knee deep and surrounded by people. I have met with my docor, my therapist, a preist and have gone to church, which is not what I normally do. I dont ask for help ever, but i am a molten blob of wimpering baby. I still love her, and because I love her so much, I know I am supposed to let her go. But this hurts more than anything I have ever experienced. I worry that I failed, and for my children. I worry i wont have the strength to make it through tomorrow.